Annual Arrse Awards

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by eye_spy, Jan 20, 2005.

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  1. Its that time of year when all the celebrities and half celebrities don their posh and often outrageous gear to attend all manner of award ceremonies. I think its about time that we had the Arrse awards ceremony. We could have various different catagories

    Best Comedy writer
    Most annoying Bint

    I would like to nominate RTFQ for best comedy writer and outstanding lifetime achievment award for the mini-RTFQ sagas

    We could get that Natasha Koblinski bird from the BBC to present the award and laugh as mini-RTFQ tries to make an acceptance speech.
  2. RTFQ


    That's nice, thanks, but the stumpy tales win hands down.
  3. What about the 'most annoying off-thread London Regiment spat' ?.
  4. I fail to believe that in the days since 10 Jan 05 anyone at all can seriously think of running a competition entiled Arrse's Most annoying Bint.

    I mean. Rlly, r u srius?
  5. Surely I'd make the nominations for that one? :D
  6. Presumably the Londons' spats are all over now that they're all retiring due to the 'illegal nature of the occupation of a sovereign country' and embarking on TV and print media careers?
  7. Spats?

    That would be the Jocks in their skirt things.

    All nice and white
  8. we could dedicate an award to the Mods, keep em sweet. Any suggestions!
  9. how about an award for the grumpiest mod?

    Manc cop, canteen cowboy? :twisted: :twisted:

    RTFQ gets my vote for storyteller of the year
  10. What about the most evil Nazi edit award for a MOD?

    Three guesses who???? :roll:
  11. with little black buttons!!!
  12. RTFQ


    Awards and who should present them:

    Jade Goody - Most annoying bint
    Simon Weston - Most desperate lonely heart
    Michael Jackson - Best New Junior Poster
    Andy McNab - Best Sh1t related thread
    Lynndie England - Best Op Telic Thread
    Claire Short - Best Political Thread
    Gerry Adams - Lifetime achievement award (Stumpy)
    Boris Johnson - Most Un PC thread
    Kate Beckinsale - Sexiest Member (RTFQ)
    Jordan - Biggest TiT
    Blunkett/TCH - Best made up story
  13. And, of course, a lifetime achievement award for anyone mentioning 'TCH' on Question Time.

    Do we have any spooks in the QT production team? - knowing the date/location of any recording featuring Defence Sec'y/Minister would be of great value.

    This award could be presented by the late, great Dr David Kelly.
  14. Ian Huntley - Funniest joke
    Ann Widdecombe - the special 'Miss Arrse' award for the best looking female member
    Rolf Harris - the thread that is most like watching paint dry
  15. I Think everyone believes i'm a Squaddie award - ????
    I'm really a Journo award - ?????
    we know your a civvy posing as a squaddie award?????