Annoying little things to do to a colleagues computer...

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by raymond_luxury_yacht, Oct 26, 2009.

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  1. My colleague, who today has decided to attempt to be my boss, has stupidly left his computer unlocked.

    So far I have: -

    1) Taken a screenshot of his desktop, saved it as a jpeg and set the jpeg as his desktop background, then deleted all his icons

    2) Replaced his name and lots of commonly used words in the Autocorrect options of Word with their Welsh equivalents

    3) Changed his not on the internal phonebook from
    Any further suggestions would be appreciated, as Mondays are boring, I'm a bit of a fatherless, I've been left unsupervised, and it's fun to be childish.
    • Like Like x 5
  2. In Word (other word processing packages are available) change the default text colour to white.

    Change the location of their My Documents folder to an empty folder
    • Like Like x 1
  3. Press CTRL, ALT and DOWN ARROW together, this will turn his screen upside down.

    CTRL, ALT, UP ARROW to turn it back!

    Eddited for mong spelling
    • Like Like x 3
  4. BrunoNoMedals

    BrunoNoMedals LE Reviewer

    In the Autocorrect options, replace important words like his boss' name, "sir", "madam", "regards", etc with something vulgar.

    The next email to the boss would read something like:

    Dear Cunty McCocksmoker,

    Please can I have a payrise?

    Kind bukkake,

    • Like Like x 2
  5. ha, bloody brilliant, never knew that, keep them coming!!
  6. go to the mouse settings and reverse all movements on the properties page
  7. Go to keyboard properties and change keyboard layout to language of your choice.
  8. Porn????
    Animal porn. Nowt to dodgy just serious enough that he'll still see the humouress side.
    Jon a gay dating site if you have his email address and just laugh as he gets gay messages apparently.
  9. Just remove the ethernet cable from the back.
  10. BrunoNoMedals

    BrunoNoMedals LE Reviewer

    Not working for me... any particular screen I should have selected? Tried it with the desktop active and nothing.
  11. SPUNK ON HIS MOUSE AND KEYBOARD!!!!!! sorry i couldnt control my caps lock urges
  12. Legend. That's going to keep me entertained for days.
  13. Might wanna check yopur contract of employment before you get sacked on the spot, mate - although I do admire the sentiment.
  14. I'd forgotten about the classic ctrl, alt, down. I think it depends on your graphcs card, but it's worked here. He's due back in the office at 1130hrs. I've got disco-leg in both legs, I'm that excited!
    • Like Like x 2
  15. About a year ago I went out and left my computer unlocked. When I got in I found I'd emailed the team manager and asked if it was a good time to declare my undying love for her. I promised revenge. I've kept it non-offensive, although I may have to step in and admit it when he calls ICT support! The screen's the right way up again, but now the bloody thing's gone onto screen saver - and it's password protected. What's done is done I guess :twisted: