• ARRSE have partnered with Armadillo Merino to bring you an ARRSE exclusive, generous discount offer on their full price range.
    To keep you warm with the best of Merino gear, visit www.armadillomerino.co.uk and use the code: NEWARRSE40 at the checkout to get 40% off!
    This superb deal has been generously offered to us by Armadillo Merino and is valid until midnight on the the 28th of February.

An interesting way to top up your pension

#4
And I’ve spent all my time worrying about how I’m going to meet the mortgage payments.

Oh Honey I’ve found a new line of work for you :twisted:
 
#6
I wondered what had happened to this story - it surfaced a while ago in local papers and then went quiet. She was doing a roaring trade apparently.

“sensuous morning tea in bed”
is a classic. Must remember to include that in my next batch of adverts!
 
#7
Jilly is a petite size 10, 36C with a slim, suntanned body and unusually attractive. She is the ultimate English Rose and loves to be borrowed and shared.”


Bollocks, shes got a face like a whelks arrse!!
 
#10
Oh, but the money he missed out on...He should have diversified into movies and publishing whilst she was on the job - could have tripled his money.

Typical ETS they blag on about delivering good education for others but are too stupid to do a job properly. :roll:

Do you think she might put an advert in the next discounts brochure?
 
#11
A policeman found it by accident while surfing the web. 'Is that true?' 'Oh yes m'lud, he was looking for broth, as he is a soup loving man, but found brothels instead'.

And what harm was he doing? Some guys got laid by a perfectly charming woman who was only concerned about her daughter's education. The poor girl will have to go to a sink Comprehensive now and become a single mother with varicose veins with a spotty boyfriend on benefits. tsk tsk.

Go and catch some real criminals you onanists (it won't let me put *******).

FS, I would like to try your sensuous breakfasts in bed, I assume the adverts will be placed in Country Life or the Officer?
 
#13
Gives the phrase PG Tips a whole new meaning..............how about Earl Grey for a bit of posh?!...................I go for Lapsang Souchon myself, dark and smoky........grrrrrrrrr...... :wink: (Sort of Mike Jackson, if you see what I mean.......) :D
 
#14
I wonder how he managed to get 'Brothel - Keeping' as a ressettlement course? Does that ressettlement place in Aldershot run one? All I can seem to find in the 'Quest' magazine is ECDL and Security Advisor.

Tell you what though, you lot are dead fussy..........I'd do his missus........ but not for a grand. I'd rather knock one out thinking about it and pay myself a quid for the pleasure, 'cos I'm cheap like that. I could then have decent holiday on the remaining £999!
 
#16
Go on then........full cash flow forecast. cost benefit analysis......oh, and I want insurance quotes on your life expectancy...............don't want my prize asset failing me before I've broken even.......... :wink:

how much do you reckon we could get for you?!!
 
#17
A policeman found it by accident while surfing the web. 'Is that true?' 'Oh yes m'lud, he was looking for broth, as he is a soup loving man, but found brothels instead'.
Funny thing is - this does happen. Just today I was looking up a train timetable at www.firstgroup.com and I made the mistake of missing out the first letter letter 'r' from the url. Try it and you will see what I mean!! - Disgusting!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
#18
Prodigal said:
Go on then........full cash flow forecast. cost benefit analysis......oh, and I want insurance quotes on your life expectancy...............don't want my prize asset failing me before I've broken even.......... :wink:

how much do you reckon we could get for you?!!

You'll get a 'full flow' girl, but it won't be cash!! :twisted:
 

Latest Threads

New Posts