An Announcement

#1
I already posted this in Lonely Hearts, but I didn't think it was getting the nessecary attention......

I would like to announce the nuptuals of myself and a fat bint I met on the bus yesterday.

As our eyes locked through the plastic window, her Firstbus uniform lovingly crumpled, and her moustachioed lips whispering lovingly, "Single is it love", I knew it was meant to be.

So, seizing my chance, I said to her, "Let us be married". And so it shall be. Therefore, me and my darling "drive" will be wed this coming Sunday in the inspection pit at the local depot. Everyone is invited, especially Crouching_Tiger, as judging by her standards we will have a double wedding in that time. Who knows, RAMC_Medic may even ask "drive" to marry him as he's walking into the Church. MDN can plan the stag night, and Gremlin can be best man.

On another note, has anyone noticed a similarity between the antics of RAMC_Medic and the "Spray and Pray" doctrine of the US? What is it mate, ask enough bints to marry you and one might actually say yes?

Anyways, im off to make the wedding arrangments, I need to get the grease out of "drives" coveralls.

You two really are a pair of sad cunts, and make a mockery of marriage in a way that Chavs, Mail Order Brides and Polygamists have not managed yet. Lets face it, did you really think you could know someone after two weeks, or was it simply that you have both developed a sweet tooth for wedding cake?

My mind is still praying that this is a wah, as despite all of Gremlins assurances that it is not, I still cannot believe that there are genuinly people with that low levels of self-esteem and brain cells in the planet today.

With Love

P
 
#2
How dare you mock the magic which is first fcuk. The pair in question are Kappa wearing cnuts of the first degree who deserve the full charade of a registry office wedding wearing white tracksuits and Elizabeth Duke jewellery.
All it needs to complete the pantomime image is GunnersQuadrant doing the Lollypop Kids dance from "Wizard of Oz" whilst scattering rose fcuking petals.
 
#9
Lol, as much as I love a bit of MOD-Bashing, does anyone else not think that our latest "ARRSE-Love" saga is a reason for cleansing the members who frequent the Lonely Hearts board in the quest for a mate with fire and flame?

Its pretty worrying that people feel the need to look for love on the internet.
 
#10
Praetorian said:
Lol, as much as I love a bit of MOD-Bashing, does anyone else not think that our latest "ARRSE-Love" saga is a reason for cleansing the members who frequent the Lonely Hearts board in the quest for a mate with fire and flame?

Its pretty worrying that people feel the need to look for love on the internet.
If you mean "cleanse" as in the cleansing touch of fire, then yes, burn the cnuts.
 
#11
the_crimp_off said:
Praetorian said:
Lol, as much as I love a bit of MOD-Bashing, does anyone else not think that our latest "ARRSE-Love" saga is a reason for cleansing the members who frequent the Lonely Hearts board in the quest for a mate with fire and flame?

Its pretty worrying that people feel the need to look for love on the internet.
If you mean "cleanse" as in the cleansing touch of fire, then yes, burn the cnuts.
Thats what I said! :p
 
#12
Praetorian said:
the_crimp_off said:
Praetorian said:
Lol, as much as I love a bit of MOD-Bashing, does anyone else not think that our latest "ARRSE-Love" saga is a reason for cleansing the members who frequent the Lonely Hearts board in the quest for a mate with fire and flame?

Its pretty worrying that people feel the need to look for love on the internet.
If you mean "cleanse" as in the cleansing touch of fire, then yes, burn the cnuts.
Thats what I said! :p
No you didn't. You said some other shite.
 

Nehustan

On ROPS
On ROPs
#18
Well Ok then ;) I popped into a friends bar, positioning myself comfortably supping my fresh lime juice with soda. 'I'm getting married' I said. 'Don't be stupid' said my friend 'who is she?'. 'Oh...' says me '...I haven't met her yet.' 'That's even more stupid...' says friend. 'Well...' says I, '...not only do I want to get married but she must be V, W, X, Y, Z.' 'You do say some stupid things sometimes...' says friend, '...you can't make a frikkin' shopping list!!!'. 'Well' says I, 'I just did'

3 Hours later I met a girl and proceeded with check list. 6 year later we have three kids, and despite some rocky times seem to be holding it together...
 
#19
Why have I missed this?

Two dumbfcuks meet on here and wish bash bosh 14 days later are tying the knot?

She better go like a belt fed wombat, even so, pair of stupid cnuts!

The only love I found on the internet was when I found ARRSE - YES FOLKS, I LOVE MY ARRSE!!! 8)
 

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