Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by crash test, Feb 24, 2012.

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  1. Having spoke to my GP yesterday about the large clump of hair that seems to have been misplaced from the side of my head, he's told me I seem to have developed Alopecia and now have a hair-style resembling that of a mangy dog!!
    Not being a vain person, I'm not that bothered by it, but any suggestions what to do about it might, I say might, put a smile on my wifes face
  2. Let it fester, cultivate some serious mange then apply for every acting job going requiring diseased looking folk, lepers and the like.
    Although you'll be a festering, gopping manky bastard the piles of cash should keep the wife happy.
    • Like Like x 1
  3. Shave the rest off? Or start wearing makup like this chap:

  4. Ask for a sympathy 3 some of the model of your choice????
  5. Shave your pubes and prit-stick them to the bald patches?
  6. Number one cut all over. Happy days.
  7. Shave your head or at least a No1 all over.

    No one looks twice at a slaphead but rugs, comb overs or spray on hair is open season for piss takes.

    Or wear a hat everywere you go?
    • Like Like x 1
  8. Better.
    • Like Like x 1
  9. Get a Bobby Charlton. Everyone loves to laugh and point a slap heads. Failing that, give yourself a buzzcut, no guard, and stop being vain, you big girl.
  10. There you go


    Or, if your hairs short just colour the patch in with a marker pen, job done :thumright:
  11. Teach her to play chess.

  12. I'd best stick to the bald facts

    It could be caused by stress or an allergic reaction (new shampoo, hair conditioner etc), it could even be because you put girlie grooming products on it. It could be that you're getting psoriasis. Find the cause and you're well on the way to finding the cure.

    Buy a hat (it could make it worse but it'll cover the mange).
  13. I've alopecia areata for about four years, it eventually grows back then may erupt again. When it does regrow it's like fine blond baby hair then it turns grey then back to it's normal colour. Usually the patches are around the size of a 5 or 10p piece, I just keep my hair short on a no.3. Your quack might have prescribed you a cortisone mousse, don't waste your money it's shite.

    It's classed as an autoimmune disorder, no not feckin' AIDs. It's your natural immune system getting confused and attacking your own cells, commonly the hair follicles although it can be more serious.

    Alopecia areata - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
  14. Draw some hair on with permanent pen - this has many benefits including:

    1. being able to change your hair colour by the hour.
    2. being able to sport combed or messy hair which will stay in place withouth the aid of hair products.
    3. not becoming bedraggled if caught in a rainstorm.

    For an extremely permanent look you could try hammerite.
  15. Is that something for the cat to play with?