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Our area car dealt with a call from one of the big houses up on Kingston Hill.
"Burglary, suspect detained"

When they got there, they found the suspect bobbing about in the middle of a swimming pool with a couple of the residents at the edge, poking him with garden tools, to stop him climbing out.

It took him awhile to drip dry in the cells.
We had one locally about 2 years ago. Loads of sirens and blue lights, Police standing back, some of them laughing.
Scrote had broken into a shed looking to see what he could steal, and came face to face with the German Shepard bitch and her litter of pups. He was led on the floor screaming in pain as half his arse and his legs looked like they'd been run through a mincer. GS was doing her best to get out of the shed to finish him off.

The owner got "Suitable words of advice", or as he put it a "Bloody well done for letting her have a good chew before calling us".
 

Ciggie

GCM
It would seem the problem of squaring the circle has finally been solved.....

119907544_10157338460491716_5947901559875471304_n.jpg


Just to pre-empt Kirkz... I know it's not a circle but an ovoid. I wonder how it works....
 
Proper old school proactive policing
Old fashioned proactive Policing … reminds me of years ago … I had a Mk2 GT Cortina … and was travelling from Northumberland to South Wales . It was in a time when it was not unusual … especially where new Motorway sections were being built for the Police to direct off perhaps twenty vehicles at a time for random checks … anyhoo I was stopped and went into the checking lane … parked the car and wound window down ... after he had checked the Tax Disc a Motorway Policeman’s head pops into the car and he takes a deep breath then he said something like “ Nothing to worry about we are just carrying checks for your own safety and if we find any minor faults please get them rectified when you complete you journey “ …. no mention of action if a major fault found . Then he checked the vehicle over … general condition , lights , tyres etc and he asked me to sound the horn so I pressed the button and … … silence … I could not believe it the horn had been working earlier … “ Nothing major Sir just get it fixed asap “ . The batch of cars I was in were all cleared and we were instructed to start up and carefully rejoin the Motorway … as I pulled away I tried the horn again … it worked ... I had Two Tone Airhorns fitted so with a “ Clarion Blast “ pulled away to a strange look from one Officer and an even stranger look from Mrs B_R
 
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Our area car dealt with a call from one of the big houses up on Kingston Hill.
"Burglary, suspect detained"

When they got there, they found the suspect bobbing about in the middle of a swimming pool with a couple of the residents at the edge, poking him with garden tools, to stop him climbing out.

It took him awhile to drip dry in the cells.
True dit.
i used to shoot with a huge Middle Eastern chap called Abraham, who looked like Saddams bigger brother and owns a very big car and truck hire Buisness based in Brum.
He has a big house in Warwickshire in the sticks with a circular drive around it.
Middle of night his wife shakes him awake “ I can hear movement down stairs, go check”. So Abraham dons his Dressing gown ( with cigar in aluminium cyl in top pocket) retrieves his 38 special from the bedside cabinet. ( they were still legal then) and heads downstairs.
One of the four intruders armed with an alloy baseball bat lunged across the living room at him, so he shot him!. The not inconsiderable noise caused his erstwhile partners to promptly fvck off out the front door, never to be seen again. The shot one staggered out the back door to the getaway car. Climbed in but only made it around the house to near the front door before grinding to a halt.
Abraham said he surveyed the scene whilst he lit his cigar to calm down , but after he had finished most of it the scroat was still breathing so he thought it was time to call the police.
As you can imagine all hell broke loose then , shotguns and pistols confiscated.( he got them back eventually)
When being interviewed by a DCI over the matter, the plod did admit that all the perps were well known to the law, violent and habitual. He ruefully commented that it might have been better for all concerned with dealing with the case if he had killed him.
Abrahams reply was succinct. “ I was trying”.
 
Well, I'll go to the foot of our stairs!

184_1000.jpg
 

endure

GCM
There are demonstrations kicking off in Bangkok at the moment. This is the site of one of them (Thammasat University) after 10,000 demonstrators had left and moved onto Sanam Luang. Can you imagine the state of it if it had happened here?

EiRqX2TVkAI9I0x.jpg
 

endure

GCM
They've all got their mats and some scran. Nothing happens in Thailand without food... ;-)

EiReThZUcAA7LpD.jpg
 
There are demonstrations kicking off in Bangkok at the moment. This is the site of one of them (Thammasat University) after 10,000 demonstrators had left and moved onto Sanam Luang. Can you imagine the state of it if it had happened here?

View attachment 505614
That looks like it was just swept ahead of an important visitor being shown around. If Brits were protesting there you wouldn't have any grass left, never mind the rubbish strewn about.
 

Mary Hinge

War Hero
You are clearly smoking some very good shit today. Hislop has dragged that once fine organ into a Tory/Trump wankfest of the highest order.
Agreed. Since Hislop took the BBC shilling it's a shadow of itself. Anti Trump, very woke and strangely enough, uncritical of the BBC and because Hislop is paid through a production company, we don't know how much he gets paid for Have I Got News For You.
 
My ex had one. You put a hard boiled egg in it as soon as you take it out of the water and peel it. It’s still slightly malleable. It then sets a as a cube and hey presto... perfect for slicing for sandwiches.
The crafty Japanese apparently like shaped eggs, I saw a TV programme (maybe the Hairy Bikers) with a heart shaped mould. The final product looked more like pert buttocks than a heart which I considered a bonus.
 

Dr Death

War Hero
1600522643943.png
 

Dr Death

War Hero
What could possibly go wrong?
1600522701748.png
 

OneTenner

LE
Book Reviewer
That I did, I've now been living in sleepy Cumbria for 24 years and my car hasn't been touched once! ;)
They're probably still trying to work out what it does....
 

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