All I want for Christmas is ................................

poet

War Hero
#2
Is big breasted lady with bacon buttes hanging off her nipples will do me
 
#5
To be snowed in at "The Tan Hill Inn" with plenty of folding, and no mobile phone.

"Cheers!" :D
 
#6
Christmas! Bah humbug, although a tall brunette super model would do.
 
#7
General Melchett said:
Christmas! Bah humbug, although a tall brunette super model would do.
If you can find one with a friend or twin sister, you'll be more than welcome at The Tan Hill.
 
#8
.... is to be spared Slade singing "Merry Christmas Everybody"
.....to have the shop assistant who is mute for the other 364 days of the year NOT wish me a Merry Christmas
......to not have every ancient relative in two families sit at my table like bl00dy vultures waiting to be fed
.......to not have Mrs Rickshaw say "are you going to have another drink?" in that "special" way
.........to avoid carol singers without recourse to laying a low wire entanglement around Rickshaw Manor
...........to not have a selection of God botherers tell me to practise peace on earth when it seems as though half the world is intent on stuffing me more than any turkey
..........to fall gently, alcoholically asleep and not wake up until the new year........
..............in case you hadn't guessed, I loathe the whole commercial, faux festive, saccharine-sweet, cliche-laden sentimental, sanctimonious bleedin' thing. Bah! Uber-humbug!!
 
#10
sandmanfez said:
General Melchett said:
Christmas! Bah humbug, although a tall brunette super model would do.
If you can find one with a friend or twin sister, you'll be more than welcome at The Tan Hill.
Cheers mate, I'll have a look. If I can't find any then I'll join you to drown our sorrows.
 
#12
christmas bay and the boxing day bond film......and not the 3 months of hard sell in the shops before it. except for my local offy who are doing a christmas deal on wife beater!
 

Auld-Yin

ADC
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
Reviews Editor
#15
A copy of the Q'uran.
 
#16
sandmanfez said:
To be snowed in at "The Tan Hill Inn" with plenty of folding, and no mobile phone."Cheers!" :D
Been there - done that but no T-shirt. Overnight only but really great. Got the fire in the main room so high no one could get within five foot. Kept sending pub dog out to check depth of snow - when it got deeper than jack russell tail we knew we were stranded.
 
#17
I'll take a one way, non-stop ticket out of this crap-hole of a country. Who in their right mind would ban alcohol?!! I mean thats just bloody uncivilized!!
 

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