Alert States

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by wedge35, Sep 29, 2005.

Welcome to the Army Rumour Service, ARRSE

The UK's largest and busiest UNofficial military website.

The heart of the site is the forum area, including:

  1. Received via email...

    European Alert Levels:

    Latest update on the European security situation
    Following the events in London a few weeks ago, the French government
    announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from 'Run'
    to 'Hide'. The only two higher levels in France are 'Surrender' and
    'Collaborate'. The rise was precipitated by a recent fire which
    destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing their
    military.
    Updates from around Europe
    The Italians have increased their alert level from "shouting excitedly"
    to "elaborate military posturing". Two more levels remain, "ineffective
    combat operations" and "change sides".
    The Germans have also increased their alert state from "disdainful
    arrogance" to "full dress-uniform and marching songs". They have two
    higher levels, "invade a neighbour" and "lose".
    Seeing this reaction in continental Europe the Americans have gone from
    "isolationism" to "find somewhere ripe for regime change". Their
    remaining higher alert states are "take on the world" and "ask the
    British for help".
    Finally here in GB we've gone from "pretend nothing's happening" to
    "make another cup of tea". Our higher levels are "chin-up and remain
    cheerful" and "win".
     
  2. Can't wait for the instalment explaining the alert states of Japan, New Zealand, China, Argentina and Switzerland. And the mind positively boggles about Holland and Spain.
     
  3. Read this, couldn't stop laughing, completely took the edge off question time. As putteesinmyhands waiting for 2nd instalment, Ack