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Air India.....

Midflight, yes, but what about the problems of takeoff ? This is a subject which has disturbed my troubled mind for a bit. Seat size. As the population becomes increasingly slobbish and gross, airlines persist in having as small seats as possible, so that a creature who would normally take up the place of 3 normal , fit humans is stuffed into something which for them represents a baby's high chair. Fair enough if there are only one or two of them on a flight, but I can see horrors ahead. Imagine an Airbus 380, already an aerodynamically and weight/balance challenged machine, with a slob on every seat actually managing to clear the perimeter fence? At Luton, it would surely put an end to car manufacturing in the UK.
Oh, that's an easy solution. You fill the entire aircraft with the overweight and make sure the flight-path starts out over the sea.

Just think of the money that'd be saved, what with not having to fill the tanks or anything.
Beaut, Carrots! Thanks!

PS, I'm still working out how it doesn't burn the tailplane off on climb, but then again I'm about 6 pilseners in by now!
Lots of airlines have height/weight guidelines for their hosties, usually couched in some ealfinsafety "as a safety professional you need to be able to respond to an emergency" doublespeak.

Part of my job used to be to teach the brand new hosties first aid (Expose the chest, form a good seal with your mouth etc... fnar fnar) and while they all looked pretty damn good at first, when they came back a year later for their refresher it was horrifying to see the excess baggage many had picked up from scoffing all the airline food. Many a pert arrse has been ruined by luke warm chicken parmiganas.
This is a skill, a definite skill. Eyeing up a totty and weighing up, as it were, what she might look like ten years hence. Expert I am, in view of the ex, still shagworthy even though now 43, and no, before anyone asks, no pics!!!!

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