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Advice on daughters behaviour

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#1
Could anybody give advice on how to deal with my daughter.

Now the smoking, drinking and going with boys I can understand but this morning I found her putting sugar on her porridge. Now this sort of behaviour is totally unacceptable but I am unsure how I should deal with her.

Should I

a. Pretend I didn't see it and hope it's just a phase she'll grow out of?

b. Hide the sugar in the morning, but this may lead to her stealling to buy sugar.

c. Replace the sugar in the sugar bowl with salt?

d. Confront her with her crimes?


Has anybody else had similar problems with their loved ones, how did you deal with them?
 
#2
.......you start off thinking that you can handle it - that you wont get addicted.......... but slowly the sugar really gets to you man!.......

.... its a downward spiral from there on.

Its degrading yes, .... but you just cant help it.

You just need that extra hit
 
#3
Damn the bi*ch! You should be ashamed of yourself as a parent, allowing this behaviour is a clear signal to the youth of today that the lines of authority are corrupt and that older generations are there to be mocked!

In no time at all she will grow from a mild user to stealing sugar in bags and selling it on the streets, probably cutting it with flour to make it go futher. Then high grade sugar will hit the club scene and she will be "icing" it up with all her friends. This will progress to dark brown and demerara and then you will need to pay for expensive rehab and saccerine sachets to deal with the cravings!!!!

Step on it now!!
 
#5
You've lost this one to the Forces of Darkness I'm afraid.

Best to chuck her out into the street with her belongings tied up in a spotted hankie and start breeding another.
 

Fang_Farrier

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#7
SuperTrooper said:
8O Sugar, that's disgusting! Everyone knows the only substance to abuse with porridge is golden syrup!

:D
Now that is way beyond normal behaviour!

I'm sure the Sweatty McFord Clinic can help with cases like yours
 
#8
Sugar, well sugar and pies, its the road to bifferdom. She may be slim and sylph-like now, but unless you nip it in the bud, she'll be a wheezing, diabetic, fat knacker inside ten years.
Aversion therapy is the answer, anytime she picks up a kit-kat/doughnut/Ginsters rabbit-punch her in the kidneys, she'll be anorexic before you know it, and you'll be a couple of grand a year better off.
I can see your eyes lighting up now Jock! :wink:
 
#10
Ahh, the Dark Forces of Anti-Salt triumph.

That it should come to this. Our Quaint Ethnic Folkways disporridged by the wicked Health Polis.

Ochone! ochone! :cry:
 
#11
Take her by her stinks-like-pish red hair, rip the bottle of buckfast out of her hand and throw her down the tenement steps.

If you let this slide the next thing you now she'll take up with Lowland Scot Sassenach ****** from Edinburgh and shame your clan eternally.

Say hello to Golly for me will you.
 
#12
The scene: silhouette of baseball cap wearing scrote being interviewed by irritatingly calm journo type:

‘It started fairly ‘armlessly. Me and a few mates were messin’ about and as a joke one of ‘em offered me some sugar. Then it got to where we were puttin’ it in our tea, under the table like. Before I knew it I were onto the ‘ard stuff; first Golden Syrup, then them cakes that make your teeth ache, and in the end Kendal mint cake.... Oh god...

<dissolves into sobbing>
 
#13
The poor lamb needs help! Think of the thousands of young girls on the street, selling their body to strangers for a hit of refined sugar. I've even seen them huffing old cereal-box lining bags in an effort to get their fix. It's deplorable.
 
#14
Lucky_Jim said:
The scene: silhouette of baseball cap wearing scrote being interviewed by irritatingly calm journo type:

‘It started fairly ‘armlessly. Me and a few mates were messin’ about and as a joke one of ‘em offered me some sugar. Then it got to where we were puttin’ it in our tea, under the table like. Before I knew it I were onto the ‘ard stuff; first Golden Syrup, then them cakes that make your teeth ache, and in the end Kendal mint cake.... Oh god...

<dissolves into sobbing>
Kendal mint cake..... the beginning of my family's ruin.....it started innocently enough with a couple of squares broken from a bar on the the top of Scafell Pike as a reward to the nippers for having made it up and as a boost for the scramble down........ then it took a sinister turn..."if we're going on the hill this weekend, you'd better make sure you've packed the Kendal mint cake"..... before you knew it it, it was, "if you want to go on the hill today, you'd better leave a couple of bars of Kendal mint cake for us if you know whats good for you".... Then there were the notes - "if you want to see your Meindls again, leave a box of Kendal mint cake at the base of the Pig Track"......... Now I live in fear and loathing, striking midnight deals with my local outdoors shop for trade-price boxes of Kendal mint cake to feed my sons' habit..........cutting it with boxes of brown sugar cubes so I can have my own stash in the top of my day sack......
 
#16
Sugar? Golden Syrup? On PORRIDGE???????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Eewww! Salt only, Gents, salt only on porridge. Nothing else. You'll be putting strawberry jam in your rice pudding next....
 
#18
Tell her this story:

At the moment I was about to load my gob with a spoonfull of G1098 porridge in a draughty transit camp 'somewhere in Wales', the Cook Sergeant sidled up behind me and uttered the immortal line whilst grinning: ' 'ere Sir, there's a bit of me in that!'

Different sort of saltiness, perhaps, but I'd now go for sugar!
 
#19
My I suggest that you bring her back to the world of salt gently? Perhaps through the use of those lovely packet numbers that come with raisins and appley-bits? :oops:
 
#20
I had three guys in my bar chatting about their 16 year old daughters. The English guy said "I went up to her bedroom yesterday and on the bed-side cabinet, there was a packet of fags ! 16 years and I didn't know she smoked."

The Porridge-wog said "I went to my daughters bedroom and next to the bed was a bottle of whisky. 16 years and I didn't know she took a dram !"

Paddy said "I went to my daughters bedroom and next to the bed was a packet of condoms. 16 years and I didn't know she was a bloke "
 

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