Advanced self-defence classes

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by OldRedCap, Jan 24, 2009.

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  1. Our police are wonderful

    I think I am permitted a snide comment now and then. So, here we go
    Two of Greater Manchester's most senior police officers were caught up in an attempted armed robbery at a McDonald's.

    Assistant Chief Constable Dave Thompson and Chief Superintendent Janette McCormick - in charge of the Trafford division - were in the fast food restaurant in Eccles at 7.30am when two men armed with a knife and a machete struck.
    Mr Thompson, the joint-third highest ranking officer in GMP, spotted one of the masked pair behind the counter trying to kick in a locked door. He stood up and challenged him shouting `Oi' while Ms McCormick dialled 999.

    Mr Thompson said that the raider pointed a knife at him before throwing a chair. The attackers escaped empty-handed. The two officers did not give chase although Mr Thompson got the registration of the getaway car.

    Mr Thompson, who was not in uniform and was wearing jogging bottoms because he was later due to attend a self-defence class, said: "We made an assessment of the situation to see if it was safe to disarm them. I let them walk out of the front door, then ran to the door and shouted the vehicle registration to Chief Superintendent McCormick. Our priority then was then to secure a crime scene and gather as much evidence as possible.

    "I was stood there in my track suit bottoms with no protective equipment. I would not have expected any of my officers to have intervened."

    The devotion to duty of these two is examplary. So very early for senior officers. But just whose example are they following - a senior Manchester officer was in the news recently and, by all accounts, he may have had an early morning meeting or two or three - or even ten. 'Methinks he doth protest too much' comes to mind when we have the repeated explanation of his informal attire. The claimed attendence at a police self-defence class is ironic. My memory is that such instruction included dealing with assailants armed with knives? Why do we have to spend money on such classes when it seems that the measured response is "Oi"? Given Mr Thompson's rank he will have attended any number of self-defence classes; perhaps he was doing an advanced Oi-shouting class?

    What would be interesting is a Google map showing the addresses of these two and the Mac. Who knows - he may have left his 'protective equipment' in the bedside locker?
  2. you'd think they'd have had a punt as a matter of personal pride, referring to policy highlights what these cnuts are like
  3. Knives are bloody dangerous things, as far as self defence goes. If you don't have to tangle with one, don't, is the usual teaching. Plus alot of police self-defence relies on the use of protective equipment. Mr Thompson makes one reference to his attire, which the commentary repeats.

    Seems fair enough to me.
  4. Meeting? ...yeah right

    I smell a scandal

    Edited due to quotting mongness
  5. Maybe she was giving him a Big Mac 8)
  6. What would DCI Hunt have done?

    At least Dave got the first bit right! :lol:
  7. Cutaway

    Cutaway LE Reviewer

    Well it is the Force - sorry, I mean Service - for scandal.

    ACC Dave Thompson's ex-boss, Michael Todd, was the CC that topped himself of top of Snowdon.
    That's Mount Snowdon, not Lord Snowdon, though you never know...
    Prior to that there was poor John Stalker shafted by Jesus Jim, chillingly accurately portrayed as Sir Malachi Jerricho in the series New Statsman.

    I understand that Mr Thompson is a bit of a hard man - he'd have to be if he was slipping a crippler to Mrs McCormick, below:


    Prior to joining the Old Bill she worked in a bakery.
    They used to push her face into the dough when making Monster Cookies.

    You wouldn't want your mates seeing you hanging out of the back doors of that now would you ? 8O
  8. Get a camera and bring her along :twisted:
  9. I apologise in advance for breaking Naffi Rules by attempting a serious reply: :oops: I don't blame the copper for not having a go. Two attackers, both armed with sharp pointy things, is way beyond the ability of most people to deal with, unless they are armed themselves. Even a world class Jap-slapper(and the vast majority of police officers - or soldiers - are not in that league)would hesitate to take on two knife-weilding opponents.

    In that kind of situation, the only reason to "have a go" would be if someone was being attacked. Otherwise give them the money and don't try to stop them leaving. Just try and memorise as many details about the scumbags as you can.

    OK, back to slagging off the coppers! In you're own time... :D
  10. Ohh FFS!!!

    WW.. nice try wi the sensible "head" on ye.....

    But, if ye were in Mickey D's after a SESH[/b], or BK or the Colonel's etc etc...

    Ye'd have a go. If it wurked fine, if it didny... ye'd still be on CCTV and then the Beeb 24hrs..

    Hell mend ye fur gawn intae MacDonalds!!!

    However, had ye been passing Mickey D's - efter having dined at Ghurka Brigade etc - and spied thru the windae some ne'er-do-wells (NEDS) - you'd be a hero in Embra!!!

    Moral of the story???....

    Hang oan till I go back to the start and read what I've typed....... :D

  11. Sparky - you know the rules: no more than HALF a bottle of McCallan's before you Post! :D

    Step AWAY from the KEYBOARD! :lol:
  12. Cutaway

    Cutaway LE Reviewer

    And I thought I was sick !
    Have you seen a quack about this ?

    Anyway the only cameras she's interested in are GATSOs.

  13. I wish... It's a pity they dinny sell it in half bottles!!!

    Who can afford a Macallan these days FFS!!!???

    Donations welcome.. please send to Sparky2339@gaggin for a reel.dott.poorcomms/pished as ever...