Adolf Hitlers naughty bedroom adventures

#4
By all accounts Adolf was a sexual tyranosaurus in the bedroom. It's rumoured that his awesome cunnilingus technique was due to the instruction taught him by Dame Thora Hird on a Stannah promotional tour of Berlin in 1937.

When Thora picked up her damehood at the Palace, her majesty was heard to whisper " Nice one Thora" whilst putting an index finger under her nose, waggling her tongue and giving a Naxi salute.
 
#5
:D
Disturbing? not really.
Funny, Oh yes!
What would be offensive is if a shed load of people, could be seen being ordered into a large hangar by people dressed in clothing not dissimilar to that worn by the Waffen SS, but with the word AIDS emblazoned on their arm bands. They are then gassed and the viewing public would be subjected to the screams of anguish of the aids victims. The same end title would then be shown.

Now that would be offensive.





I should work in advertising me.
 
#6
I was expecting something on DVD with bad acting and big titties blondes..

how disappointing...
 
#7
FiveAlpha said:
By all accounts Adolf was a sexual tyranosaurus in the bedroom. It's rumoured that his awesome cunnilingus technique was due to the instruction taught him by Dame Thora Hird on a Stannah promotional tour of Berlin in 1937.

When Thora picked up her damehood at the Palace, her majesty was heard to whisper " Nice one Thora" whilst putting an index finger under her nose, waggling her tongue and giving a Naxi salute.
You swine! I'm now wiping coffee off the screen and trying to dry off the keyboard!
 
#9
Aids does not murder people any more than drug or alcohol abuse does. Usually both paticipants decide that they fancy a sh*g, do the business and it is only after a few months they decide that unprotected sex was a bad idea. Like drug addiction and alcoholism there is no cure. The main difference being that if you get aids you will almost certainly die of it. The moral of the story here is "If you want to die early just resist the sexual temptation and get pissed instead". Mind you in Army parlance this is the regognised norm.
 

B_AND_T

MIA
Book Reviewer
#11
FiveAlpha said:
Fcuk me, I bet you're a right laugh at parties! Shame Thora's not still around as a good fcuk would sort you out.
Nothing personal 5A, but you could start an argument in an empty room. :roll:
 
#13
This is very unfair. Adolph was a vegetarian and kind to animals. I'm sure he'd have used a prophylactic when taking a slapper up the Scott Ritter.

The monstrous Barry O, with his NHS style final solution to the senior question would have been a more suitable leading man.
 
#14
B_AND_T said:
FiveAlpha said:
Fcuk me, I bet you're a right laugh at parties! Shame Thora's not still around as a good fcuk would sort you out.
Nothing personal 5A, but you could start an argument in an empty room. :roll:
You think my comment constitutes an argument? More of a fact judging by his eye-wateringly numbing post.
 
#15
Showed it to a mate, got him going "Ahh, showing Hitler in a bad light are we...?"

Good things A. Hitler did:

• Outlawed tobacco use. (California followed suit, and then the rest of the USA)
• Outlawed vivisection (experimenting on animals)
• Commissioned Ferdinand Porsche to come up with an economical, low maintenance auto for the common people. (That car was the VW Beetle)
• Invented the interstate highway system
• Created a fleet of cruise ships for the exclusive use of blue-collar workers.
• Created a ‘cable network’ for radios. (this was really the first Internet)
• Under his direction, they were the predecessors of modern aircraft.
• By testing students to see what their strong subjects were such as math, science, or writing, he would be able to direct these students towards success in their given fields. Also not having them waste their time on subjects of no interest to their future.
• Prior to the war’s outbreak, he had orchestrated a thriving forestry program of 869.300 employed by the forestry service under the third Reich.
• Research into the health effects of radiation, asbestos, heavy metals, alcohol and tobacco
• Mandated the production of organic foods and encouraged vegetarianism and natural healing
• Pursued alternative energy instead of oil or nuclear energy, regarded by the Nazis as “Jewish physics”. Hitler only began nuclear research “grudgingly” in response to American efforts.
• Encouraged managed breeding programs for young Germans.
• Brought in social benefits such as worker's holidays.
• Created the first pan-European army (Waffen-SS)
• Interest free loans of up to 1,000 Deutschmark were paid to newly-married couples provided that the wife having hitherto been a wage earner relieves the labor market by her marriage. The loan is redeemable at the rate of 1% per month, and for each child born is reduced by 25%.
• A subsidized housing program was based on providing all German families with a maximum of two-storey accommodation each with its own garden "thereby developing attachment to the soil." The building of marionettes and flats was discouraged.
• In December 1933 the Reich Anticancer Committee was founded to better organize and coordinate the nationwide research towards cancer. A lot of attention was being paid to preventive medicine, especially early detection. Later on, even more emphasis was laid upon prevention.
• April 30, 1938: Youth Protection Law: also later on, children and young mothers got barred from working under specific circumstances.
• German bakeries were required to produce whole-grain bread. Healthy food was marked with the seal of approval of the NSDAP's Office of Public Health.
• Granted women's rights in the workplace.
• Adolf Hitler Passed the FIRST IN HISTORY Anti pollution laws, restricting greedy corporate business men from polluting the environment for a bigger profit.
• Paper manufacture has increased by 50%
• The manufacture of diesel oil has increased by 66%
• The production of coal has increased by 68%
• The production of oil fuel has increased by 80%
• The production of mineral oil has increased by 90%
• The production of artificial silk has increased by 100%
• The production of Kerosene has increased by 110%
• The production of steel has increased by 167%
• The production of lubricating oil has increased by 190%
I'd also add to that list, commissioned Hugo Boss to make some very nifty uniforms. Definately won the war in regards to uniforms... That sounds too gay.

Still, yeah. Hitler has AIDS. :twisted:
 
#16
I tell you AIDS is a real damper. Around 8 years ago I was moving round Botswana / Angola / mozambique / RSA and there were some stunning birds available - Zimbabwe too. But common sense prevailed and I refrained. Use condoms, the UN doctor told me. Yeah, like I want to be within a few microns of infection. I remember giving a bird in Belize a very energetic botty bonk in 1975 and ending up with the condom ring / cuff, whatever it's called, around the base of me old man and the rest of it lost somewhere up the birds council gritter. Thankfully, AIDS hadnt really taken off in Belize at that time. Nowadays I stick to face painting, its a bit less risky.
 
#17
Squiggers said:
Showed it to a mate, got him going "Ahh, showing Hitler in a bad light are we...?"

Good things A. Hitler did:

• Outlawed tobacco use. (California followed suit, and then the rest of the USA)
• Outlawed vivisection (experimenting on animals)
• Commissioned Ferdinand Porsche to come up with an economical, low maintenance auto for the common people. (That car was the VW Beetle)
• Invented the interstate highway system
• Created a fleet of cruise ships for the exclusive use of blue-collar workers.
• Created a ‘cable network’ for radios. (this was really the first Internet)
• Under his direction, they were the predecessors of modern aircraft.
• By testing students to see what their strong subjects were such as math, science, or writing, he would be able to direct these students towards success in their given fields. Also not having them waste their time on subjects of no interest to their future.
• Prior to the war’s outbreak, he had orchestrated a thriving forestry program of 869.300 employed by the forestry service under the third Reich.
• Research into the health effects of radiation, asbestos, heavy metals, alcohol and tobacco
• Mandated the production of organic foods and encouraged vegetarianism and natural healing
• Pursued alternative energy instead of oil or nuclear energy, regarded by the Nazis as “Jewish physics”. Hitler only began nuclear research “grudgingly” in response to American efforts.
• Encouraged managed breeding programs for young Germans.
• Brought in social benefits such as worker's holidays.
• Created the first pan-European army (Waffen-SS)
• Interest free loans of up to 1,000 Deutschmark were paid to newly-married couples provided that the wife having hitherto been a wage earner relieves the labor market by her marriage. The loan is redeemable at the rate of 1% per month, and for each child born is reduced by 25%.
• A subsidized housing program was based on providing all German families with a maximum of two-storey accommodation each with its own garden "thereby developing attachment to the soil." The building of marionettes and flats was discouraged.
• In December 1933 the Reich Anticancer Committee was founded to better organize and coordinate the nationwide research towards cancer. A lot of attention was being paid to preventive medicine, especially early detection. Later on, even more emphasis was laid upon prevention.
• April 30, 1938: Youth Protection Law: also later on, children and young mothers got barred from working under specific circumstances.
• German bakeries were required to produce whole-grain bread. Healthy food was marked with the seal of approval of the NSDAP's Office of Public Health.
• Granted women's rights in the workplace.
• Adolf Hitler Passed the FIRST IN HISTORY Anti pollution laws, restricting greedy corporate business men from polluting the environment for a bigger profit.
• Paper manufacture has increased by 50%
• The manufacture of diesel oil has increased by 66%
• The production of coal has increased by 68%
• The production of oil fuel has increased by 80%
• The production of mineral oil has increased by 90%
• The production of artificial silk has increased by 100%
• The production of Kerosene has increased by 110%
• The production of steel has increased by 167%
• The production of lubricating oil has increased by 190%
I'd also add to that list, commissioned Hugo Boss to make some very nifty uniforms. Definately won the war in regards to uniforms... That sounds too gay.

Still, yeah. Hitler has AIDS. :twisted:
 

rampant

LE
Kit Reviewer
Book Reviewer
#18
Squiggers said:
Showed it to a mate, got him going "Ahh, showing Hitler in a bad light are we...?"

Good things A. Hitler did:

........
• A subsidized housing program was based on providing all German families with a maximum of two-storey accommodation each with its own garden "thereby developing attachment to the soil." The building of marionettes and flats was discouraged.
I'd also add to that list, commissioned Hugo Boss to make some very nifty uniforms. Definately won the war in regards to uniforms... That sounds too gay.

Still, yeah. Hitler has AIDS. :twisted:
What the hell did he have against puppets, was Pinnochio a Jew?
 
#19
Out zer Vindow Renate;

Renate Müller was born in Munich, Germany, on 26th April 1906. She became an actress and made several films including Love in the Ring (1930), Darling of the Gods (1930), Flute Concert of Sans-Souci (1931), The Office Girl (1931), The Little Escapade (1931) and the Flower Woman of Lindenau (1932).

Müller meet Adolf Hitler while making a film on location near the Danish coast. They spent a great deal of time together but the relationship became strained as a result of his strange behaviour.

After Müller left Hitler she was followed by the Gestapo. As Müller had information that could damage Hitler she became worried about her safety. She became addicted to morphine and went into a sanatorium. On 1st October 1937 Renate Müller was looking out of a window when a car pulled up outside the sanatorium and four SS officers got out. In a state of panic she jumped out of the window and was killed.

Was the Cpl Der Dritte Mann;

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kZ8uR1corJM
 

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