Addicted to Rubbish TV.

Discussion in 'Films, Music and All Things Artsy' started by Issimondias, Dec 2, 2006.

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  1. I've recently found myself drawn to rubbish American programmes, most notably "Worlds Most Amazing Videos".

    Have you seen it?

    It's got the worst commentary ever - 'watch as the stuntman gets enveloped in a fiery fireball of flames' and 'look as his lifeless body hits the ski slope" and then goes on to say how he survived with a broken wrist and contusions.
    It also appears that most of the commentary is completely fictional, it's as if somebody has sent them a video and they've had to work out the story themselves.
    You'll see a rally car crashing, as they often do, but the commentary will state -
    ' in this stock car race, the plucky race car driver didn't realise that his engine would suffer a cataclysmic failure that would send him spinning out of control in a desperate fight for survival'
    when he could have said
    'look what happens when you take a corner too fast'

    It’s absolute bobbins but more addictive than crystal meth, be warned!
  2. Hi , I,m Sherriff John Burnell..........
  3. I'd forgotten about him - "watch as this speeding convict gets himself a one way ticket to the county jail"
  4. General Melchett

    General Melchett LE Moderator

    Don't worry our office has become drawn to "LK Today" and "Loose women".
  5. blue-sophist

    blue-sophist LE Good Egg (charities)

    Oh, God, Sherrif John - don't you just luuurve those teeth!! and the tan! and the folksy hard-man style! :pukel: :pukel: :pukel:
  6. Judge Judy. I have no shame, I loved her back home and I love her now.

    Who can't use a dose of "no-bullsh!t, Noo Yawkah, vaguely conservative old broad on the bench shouting at idiots" once in a while?
  7. Watch the american equivelent of Road wars for sheer american hype.

    Lee Boardman ' This muppet took the 30mph zone at 75, only just missing a lamp post, 3 oncoming cars and 2 sheep before coming to rest in a field' in a tone of voice that says what a bloody moron.

    American way ' Oh my gawd, oh my gawd he's on the wrong side of the road, oh my gawd oh my gawd' in a tone of voice that suggests an impending cardiac arrest.

    With just about every cop car america owns on his tail it seems, half of which have been totalled. :lol:
  8. due to its incredible cheapness, in last 2 months i have managed to buy and watch all 4 series of the professionals, and thoroughly enjoy it
  9. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP

    Hi,I'm Sheriff John Burnell...... :p
  10. Spike7451 wrote

    I'm back with even more smaaashes, craaashes aaaaand baaashes. Gasp in horror when this car hits this lamp post....hang onto your seats as this stolen bus rampages down the hiiighwaaay.....

    All said in a very excited american accent and done with cheerleaders highkicking and waving pom poms. ( so ok i made that bit up, but you do actually expect to see them dancing under a scoreboard ) :lol:
  11. Hmm

    Trailer Trash TV!
  12. A fine upstanding ex member of the law enforcement community......

    Famous Quotes:

    For the criminals, cash is for taking, cars are for chasing and law is for breaking

    When the cops take him down, they take him down HARD.

    If you're drinking, a designated driver is a good thing. However, if they drink, it isn't.

    These teenage junkies were looking for a nicotine fix... but their smoking proved harmful to everyone's health

    When Mother Nature hits the road; we all better give way.

    This crazed madman used a cell phone while trying to escape the LAPD. But the only phone he'll be using from now on in is the one at the state pen

    Whenever you are in a high-speed chase, it is going to be dangerous. But when you are involved in a high speed chase going 100 MPH down the wrong way of the highway, then it is really dangerous.

    This Teenage renegade of the road is one step from getting away, but the officers of Rhode Island state police department perform a perfect California stop, now he's one step away from a prison sentence.

    Hamburgers, hotdog's, apple pie and baseball, America has given the world many things... including high speed pursuits.

    This maniac, hopped up on a combination of drink and drugs, needs to be taken out before he kills somebody.

    This idiot is going the wrong way down a one way street - the cops gave him a one way ticket, straight to jail!

    This berading bozo thought that a speed-ball and some malt liquor was the recipe for a good time on the highway. Little did he know- All good times must come to an end!

    It was only a matter of time, before time ran out.

    This idiot is jaywalking right in front of an LAPD officer! He doesn't know it now, but he'll have plenty of time to walk...around the exercise pen! JAIL!

    This low-life drugs-pusher thought he could mess with State Trooper Frank Sincera, but Sincera had other ideas. Sincera executes a perfect California stop, and sends this renegade back where he belongs, IN JAIL

    This youthful robber couldn't get one over the experienced shop keeper on his own turf!

    The camera is the officers silent partner, only his eye never blinks can happen to us, at any time, at any place

    These guys paid with their lives... in jail!

    The man rams the guardrail. and thats when the police decide to do a little ramming of their own.

    Although their drunken antics may seem amusing, there's nothing funny about ten years in a federal pen.

    You do the crime, you do the time!

    Its like looking for a 80 mph needle in a skyscraper haystack.

    This man fights the law and the law wins - THE LAW OF GRAVITY.

    This woman pays the price for driving over the speed limit and under the influence

    He was sky-high on a two day crack binge and wired to the max. He was never gonna hide from Orange County 's finest. There's no place for felons like him, that's why he's heading straight for the county jail.

    Life's one high speed chase and you're riding shotgun!

    They tried the Freeway, they tried the Highway, they tried any which way, and they were taken down!

    They fought the law, and the law won.

    After robbing a dry cleaners, these bad move bandits got their own dry cleaning, and they were taken down!

    Don't mess with the law, or mother nature!

    This is a police squad car... it's a crime fighting tool.

    Out of options, out of their minds!

    Now this maniac is having his own private party. IN JAIL!

    When these three crooks split up to evade the cops they weren't expecting a gift from the Cleveland P.D.. But they got one alright! They each received one-way tickets to the local slammer.

    Petty thugs, selling drugs. If you think you can try and sell bammer – you'll end up going to the slammer!

    Hi I'm Sheriff John Bunnel. In the next 30mins you will witness some of the world's worst drivers and world's wildest police video chases

    Miami Florida, Home of Disney Land, The Miami Dolphins, and today - A HIGH SPEED PURSUIT!

    Check out this crazed maniac. he is like a high octane hornet trying to evade the cruiser.

    They tried to run from the police... but they couldn't escape the law.

    A temporary moment of insanity can result in permanent consequences.

    You have the power, you can make a difference. Keep the peace!

    This renegade punk thought he could out run the law

    In this case it was out of the frying pan, into the jail cell..

    He makes a mad dash for the exit, but this cops wits are faster than him

    Before parking behind that dump truck, make sure that DUMP truck driver isn't a DUMB truck driver

    This joy-rider thought he was going to have a swell ride ...but all he got was a short ride in the back of a cruiser to jail
  13. blue-sophist

    blue-sophist LE Good Egg (charities)

    TBU - you worry me. Don't you have something better to do, like go to the lavatory? :roll:
    You actually typed all that up yourself? :muhaha:
  14. Naked Wild On. Now that's quality stuff.