Ad for toilet paper

That ad makes no sense; dogs LIKE stinky arseholes.

More likely, the the toilet paper is rubbish and the dog is trying to trick people into going around with stinky arseholes.
It's fucking sexist too. Notice it doesn't accuse the women of not wiping their arses properly? The bloke who wrote it must be a gayer because he's obviously never rimmed a slapper.
Viz ran a nice advert for comfy bum;

'Cleans the shit off your arse,
And your finger won't go through it.'

That'll do for me Tommy.
By smoothe bog roll, I take it you mean the Izal of fifty years ago? I was stunned the first time I experienced the stuff. About the same grade of paper creameries (here) use to wrap sticks of butter.
IZAL - The John Wayne of toilet paper.

-Rough, tough and takes shit off no fecker!

This is the stuff you need, no messing.


I use Baby Erse Wipes....... much nicer than toilet paper. You can wash then out, dry them off and recycle them.... I'm into recycling in a big way....
Years back I went to Costco and bought a box of their moist wipes. It was only after a $500 drain cleaning bill I noticed the microscopic printing "do not flush."

So more recently Costco began marketing Kirkland (house) brand Flushable Moist Wipes - safe for septic system and sewer."

So far I'm into this experiment to the tune of $790 and the disturbing news the actual pipe from the house to the city's sewer line will cost either $5000 or $10,000. My portion of the line is damaged and the TV camera "locate" showed two large root balls obstructing. So that was another $150 for 2.5 gallons of Crossbow - a really powerful herbicide. One cup down the pan each week followed by two flushes. I cannot imagine what the city would have to say about that, but it was recommended by a licensed plumber.

Maybe I'll just have a bidet installed.

Shit! In both meanings of the word.

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