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A 'what would you do in this situation' question

Hmm, single at 50. Common sense says the flat, but that doesn’t leave much scope for hiding the bodies of prostitutes for the inevitable next phase of your life.

The terrace is ideal, the underfloors can be quite deep, so you might not even have to hack the bodies up before stuffing them in there. The rising damp is a bonus, good excuse for any funny smells and a legitimate excuse for relaying the flooring.

if it’s got a cellar, that’s for winners. You should consider acid as a disposal method, that way you can increase your killing spree specifically. Check it’s got a good drain, schoolboy error of bits of whore get caught in there.
 
Low level being up to 1M from the floor level (which needs to be stripped/treated and replastered). The floors are wooden boards above the ground level and it's probably just earth/rubble below that.

Try to see if it's got a slate or a poured bitumen damp proof course.
 
That's what the damp co have quoted for, chemical DPC and replastering affected walls to 1m about floor level.
If you had a full survey, and like the idea of a house, you at least have ammunition to demand a hefty reduction in the asking price.
However, if you demand that and they cave in, that itself would possibly be a warning, tbh.
 

Dwarf

LE
Flat, less space equals less housework and maintenance. I'm you and I'm in a really small place but nice garden and less to do on saturday morning.
No money worries. You can always sell up and have downpayment on a new place in the next year or two.

Older houses, solid but lots of work, unexpected problems and expenses. More housework and maintenence. Worries about paying the mortgage.
You never know what's around the corner.
Last year I finished my mortgage, looked forward to paying off a couple of things with retirement looming. Took a risk on a new project and took out a loan, covid hit and affected the business, now I owe around 25k to the bloody bank. We should pay it off but it's still unexpected.
The house could suck you in with no margin for safety.

But if you really want god advice buy a pack of these;


1594850799474.png
 
That's what the damp co have quoted for, chemical DPC and replastering affected walls to 1m about floor level.
And when they start hacking the old plaster off you can guarantee swathes of the stuff above a metre high will blow or will already be blown too and will need re-plastering.

It is a job that will grow in cost as they can’t quote for things they can’t know the extent of (like blown plaster) before hand.
 

Jammy66

War Hero
Thanks for the responses so far, it is helping me collect my thoughts.

I kind of feel backing out of the house is being 'weak' if you know what I mean but I don't have the funds for a money pit if that's what it turned out to be.

I had a flat previously and trust me, I know everything there is to know about dodgy freeholders/management co's, problem neighbours and the limitations of being a mere leaseholder to do anything about them..... the problem is you can never really know what you're getting into until you're in it!
 

Jammy66

War Hero
Try to see if it's got a slate or a poured bitumen damp proof course.

Slate apparently but I can't see it - they suspect that resurfacing the pavements has risen the ground level to at or above the original dpc. It's one of those with the door onto the street (but a nice little cul de sac so not too busy).
 
Food for thought definitely......

Will you be going for the classic ball pain hammer? A bit old skool, a bit Peter, or a little more contemporary with a balanced claw hammer.

Of course, you have an option Peter never had, you can buy your weapon of choice through amazon, then dispose of the evidence with a return.
 
Will you be going for the classic ball pain hammer? A bit old skool, a bit Peter, or a little more contemporary with a balanced claw hammer.

Of course, you have an option Peter never had, you can buy your weapon of choice through amazon, then dispose of the evidence with a return.
Bludgeon with a frozen leg of lamb, cook and then serve the evidence to the police when they turn up.

Cheers RD ;)
 

theoriginalphantom

MIA
Book Reviewer
I wouldn't ask the loonies on arrse for advice for starters
 
Even if house prices don't drop much, they aren't going to suddenly surge upwards. The problem might be that people just don't bother selling so there might not be much to choose from for those that want to buy.
...the Covid second wave will bring some houses onto the market, a third wave and there will be a glut... by the fourth wave you'll have your choice of derelict properties and so if you're still around I'd choose one with high boundary walls the zombies can't climb over...
 
Just google "Is rising damp a myth"
I really am sorry, I cannot evaluate your damp problem via the interweb.

But just look at this product;

Capture.PNG damp.PNG


" An injectable damp proof course that easily fills pre-drilled holes. Diffuses within the damp wall forming a water repellent barrier to stop the water passing from one place to another. Applied with a conventional cartridge gun."
And ask yourself how that can work.


Slate apparently but I can't see it - they suspect that resurfacing the pavements has risen the ground level to at or above the original dpc.
So you have penetrating damp not rising.
 
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For those who don't believe in rising damp, look up "capillary".

That said, Victorian houses are often blamed for having rising damp when the problem originates in the opposite direction - moisture travels down from a leaky roof into a rubble-filled wall and exits at the bottom of the wall with no obvious evidence of wetness higher than a foot or so above the bottom of the wall.

Victorian houses are brilliant and will last longer than just about anything built before or since - provided it was built correctly (e.g. rubble-filled walls were actually filled with mortar-bound rubble) and have been correctly maintained.

Correctly maintained means:
Pointing has been replaced as required with lime mortar throughout the building's life;
It has a coal fire that has been lit every day for at least 12 hours.
It has single-glazed, wooden-framed sash windows complete with draughts.
There is a quarter inch gap under all doors, exterior and interior, to promote ventilation (aka draughts).
Tiles and chimney pots are intact.
The roof is steeply pitched and there are gaps under the eaves to promote ventilation.
The building has never been fitted with electric or gas heating (too dry or too moist, respectively).
Any after-market pipes and cables should be surface-laid to prevent damage to plaster.
Make sure that gutters and down-pipes don't leak and are cleared regularly - the water will make it's way into the house through the brickwork.

It also helps if the building has never been in the vicinity of an aerial bomb - that can prove disastrous to the dpc.

You should be wary of any Victorian property that has loose plaster - the horse-hair used to provide reinforcement may contain anthrax. Similarly, be very careful with the asbestos and the lead water pipes. In the latter case, you have to make a value judgement - keep the pipes and risk blindness and death or replace them and risk dampness as you disturb the dpc.

As to deciding whether to buy a house or a flat - you can own a house but you'll only ever borrow a flat.
 
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Slate apparently but I can't see it
Most likely someone has repointed the brickwork at some time in the past and chased the slate back 10mm. 10mm you might get away with but it's also possible that the heavy-handed apprentice, wishing to appear keen, chased it 25mm, in which case, you probably won't.

They should have used a tool called a quirk to keep the slate intact. Unfortunately, a quirk is a stonemason's tool, not a bricklayers.
 
I'm currently homeless having sold my last home and looking for another place to buy.

I had a flat and had to sell (long story). Currently renting a mates place but he's just sold it so my time here is limited.

I'm early 50's with a (very) full time job - secure as it can be but we were taken over by another company recently so who knows what their plans might be. My pension provisions are pretty minimal and I'm starting to get worried about that stage of life (sure, I should have worried sooner!).

I put an offer in on a house, victorian terrace, it needs some updating and general tidying up but having had the survey it has some damp issues which are more involved - rising damp on internal walls as well as the exterior walls. The quote to fix is a few grand but I know when floors get taken up there's bound to be some more work, as well as needing new windows and other obvious jobs it's at least £10K of work to get it up to a reasonable standard.

On the other hand I've also seen a flat that came up in a very nice area. It's a flat so it's smaller with no outside space but opposite a common, inside is all fine, no work required. The seller has moved out already and wants a quick sale so I could buy it for cash. No mortgage and save that money in a pension fund.

I'm going around in circles trying to decide at this stage in life whether I should take on the 'project' house which might tie me up in money and time, but is a freehold and will be all mine, or take the less stressful option of a flat in a really nice area and have less space but less stress and the ability to save etc.

So, what would you do?

Buy them both, negotiating 150% of estimated repairs off the cost of the house. And you should be placing cost around 85% of the lowest appraisal, before you start the real negotiations.
Live in the flat, rent out the house. They get to pay your mortgage(s), you can dig out round the foundation, coat it and cover it back up after you already have the suckers on the hook, er, tenants in occupancy.
 
Try to see if it's got a slate or a poured bitumen damp proof course.

Yes. Many surveyors stick a probe in plaster and say "suspected" rising damp. Usually bollocks, it's internal humidity. If plaster had a high iron content, they'd condemn building as uninhabitable due to damp

Remember, they're protecting themselves above being open & honest to you

Google Jeff Howell
 
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