A Tribute to NAAFI/Garrison Slappers (merged discussions)


Come on, it's time to warn everyone!, and give me some trapping locations as I like's 'em ugly!


Warcop training camp's NAAFI has females who are heavily challenged on the weight front. Don't know if they're goers or not though.


War Hero
Barry budden outside dundee, Culty Bragen in Comrie (Miles from FCUKing nowhere), Garelochhead, the list is long.......
For those of a more southerly disposition I recall a bar maid in the NAAFI at Napier Barracks who we nicknamed 'Mrs Mangle' (of Neighbours fame). She had very few teeth and mathcing morals. A comrade alleged to have potted her brown in the grave yard whilst walking her home - a brave, though foolhardy, man indeed! I wonder if she is still there? I am sure the grave yard is.



mmmm..... i still have very nastey memories of being at Gibralta barracks in Camberly... there was this really horrid thing serving up food in the mess and "dripping" on the food, we all thought it was a bloke till the famous " More chips on 2" in a really squeeky voice rang out, when i left there was a £5k bounty on her fat ass to shag her, as far as i know it's bigger


There used to be a real big lardy jock lass in the NAAFI in Lisburn in the early nineties. Man, she was scary and used to shout at you if you looked at her wrong.

Oh! and any of the NAAFI staff in Benbecula!!!!
Was that the lumpy faced one who wore so much make up, she resembled a cross between Barbara Cartland and Quasimodo? She spoke like Billy Connoly and swore like a Geordie miner. Do you know she was actually married? He must have been either hard as woodpecker lips or shit scared. Yeah, I think she'd win this competition hands down...........like she won most of her fights!
I think you are on to the right one there Ma, she looked as if she could give Mike Tyson a run for his money - By God she was fcuking ugly and I had repressed the memory. I think she was joined un-unholy matromony to a bloke in the Sigs - or was it UDR? (I did see it drinking in the UDR bar one night) Or maybe a Pioneer on the gate? Just happy it was NOT me.


Ma_Sonic said:
Was that the lumpy faced one who wore so much make up, she resembled a cross between Barbara Cartland and Quasimodo? She spoke like Billy Connoly and swore like a Geordie miner.
That's the one! She used to scare the shit out of me - whenever she was on the counter I used to ask one of the bigger kids to order for me. :D :D

Shame us

Not quite 'NAAFI staff' level, but do any Bosnia vets have any fond memories of those lovely laundry women at the metal factory?

Shame us

They'll be the ones!

Any idea why they'd lock themselves in their CO RI MECs for 10 minutes at a time, Ma? :wink:

Shame us

Swappin' something, alright (apparently)


War Hero
Morning 'dear, how's yerself ? :wink:

Right I'll kick this one off :D I was the sec 2i/c when we were attached to the Harrier Supp Sqn for thier annual 'orf to the woods bash'. While we were preparing the site, prior to the arrival of Crab Air, were were visited by some Hun tottie on bikes that just sort of hung aboot. So, me and the Sec Cmdr fromed a cunning plan which basically involved pulling rank with the unwashed scum and commandeering the big tent we had. Twas not only a cunning plan but it worked too !! and having done the RHIP thing and banished the oggies we had ourselves a fine old time :twisted: . Michty these Jerry birds are fit and full of..erm...initiative. 8O
So, next day, there was a fair ammount of 'We got fecked last night nah nah nah nah na !!' Until we discovered that the Rock Apes security section had been through the pair of them the night before 8O 8O 8O 8O

AND, not just the NCO's, FFS, the whole lot of the wretches.

Fecking RAF commoners.

Ubique ya bass !!!
One time me and some lads went to the "Red Hen" outside JHQ, we picked up these Hun birds and took them back for some light refreshments, they were all a 7/10 so no one cared who got who and "mine" came back to my scratcher with me, we were snogging and touching then i took het blouse off, she undressed me, i slipped her jeans down and fcuk me the biggest pair of granny pants and the hairiest legs i had ever seen, i couldnt stop laughing, i slipped two fingers in the bike rack to be sure it was a lady...it was but i lost all interest due to uncontrollable fits of laughter...

kicked her out and slipped one of the wrist instead.

There used to be a bird got into the squadron lines at nienburg most weekends, we caught her coming out of our troop lines and fire hosed her off the balcony the rancid f**ker.
and some bird i vaguely remember being handcuffed to a table in the sqn bar all weekend until we sold her to dog squadron for 2 crates and 4 pies
(i think we were diddled to be honest).aaaah happy days.
sorry MB , i'll try and keep my posts vaguely somewhere over the wheel rut.
but getting back to our troop minger , i vaguely remember her marrying someone from a dutch AA unit down the road , oh how we sniggered when we saw the "loving couple" down town knowing full well she'd had half our regiment roar up her :lol:
Hmmm...there was a girl like that in Aldershot years ago.....screwed her way through her husbands reg and he was oblivious to it, right under his nose and all....even when he read her diary with all gory details...she told him it was just her fantasies and he believed her! What a stoopid fecker!

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