Potatoes Well, a Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, and finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam'. Of course, they wanted the best for Yam. When it was time, they told her about the facts of life. They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like 'Hot Potato'. Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her! But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato either. She would eat properly so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring Cousins. When she went off to Europe, Mr. And Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for those hard-boiled guys from Ireland and the greasy guys from France called the French Fries. And when she went out West, she must watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped. They sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato University ). So that when she graduated she'd really be "in the Chips". But in spite of all they did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Richie Benaud. "Richie Benaud!!!!, they cried. They were very upset and told Yam "You can't possibly marry Richie Benaud because he's just ....... Are you ready for this? Are you sure? * OK! You asked for it: Here it is! * * ... just a COMMONTATER!"