A real mans BBQ

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Surrey_Trog, Apr 23, 2010.

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  1. Now I've seen it I want one :D , but they don't seem to have them in B&Q.

    Anyone else got a 'relevant' BBQ?

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  2. I'm an admin on the largest firearms website in the world - AR15.com. One of our staff members is a Texan who tows around a gigantic BBQ oven on a trailor. He competes throughout the Southwest and has entered some of the tastiest, sauced beef you will have ever savored in your entire life.

    You joes in the U.K. should follow suit of those NRA competition shooters. We host UK friends every year. They ALL boast about having the best time of their lives.

    Don't pass it up.
  3. I watched a programme recently about some massive event held annually in the States. It's a BBQ cook off with teams from all over America entering. I'm planning a family holiday when I leave the army to coincide with the event, purely so I can stuff my fat face with hunks of meat whilst simultaneously supping my body weight in ale. Beautiful.
  4. Fast edit, L_J, but not fast enough!

    So, is this website of yours about large forearms or does it merely cause them?
  5. When I was a small child I remember watching a massive American BBQ on TV... I think it was called Napalm Viet Nam!
    As we enter the BBQ season it is important to refresh your memory on the etiquette of this sublime outdoor cooking activity. When a man volunteers to do the BBQ the following chain of events are put into motion:
    (1) The woman buys the food.
    (2) The woman makes the salad, prepares the vegetables, and makes dessert.
    (3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill - beer in hand.
    (4) The woman remains outside the compulsory three metre exclusion zone where the exuberance of testosterone and other manly bonding activities can take place without the interference of the woman.

    Here comes the important part:

    More routine...
    (6) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
    (7) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is looking great. He thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he flips the meat

    Important again:

    More routine...
    (9) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins, sauces, and brings them to the table.

    (10) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.

    And most important of all:
    (11) Everyone PRAISES the MAN and THANKS HIM for his cooking efforts.

    (12) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed ' her night off ' and, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no pleasing some women!
  7. Surrey Frog knows as much about BBQing as Mozart knows about Rap.
  8. Whilst it's important to get these things of your chest, this thread is supposed to be about the BBQs kind sir.
  9. Ale Walt! Nobody could drink that much.
  10. as a petrol head, i prefer this one


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  11. Trog,
    I see a fundamental flaw in your BBQ rules.
    Salad has no place in a real mans BBQ.
    Salad is for people who don't really understand BBQs
    Bread is only acceptable to stop you burning your fingers on the hot as the sun meat products.
    And cutlery.......cutlery....

    Really man, get a grip. Take yourself outside and have a word.
  12. Salad? Salad???

    Salad is what food eats.
  13. Now this is how boere have a braai, as they say a boer always makes a plan. Karate water anyone? :rambo:

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  14. Not a photo, but this will bring a tear to any Yarpy's eye (and for the hard of thinking, 'braai' is Afrikaans for barbecue). Actually, to any guy's eye - this ode to a barbecue.

    I would not bother explaining this to any woman; they would never understand in their life time, this is men's business, serious men's business!

  15. I must be to young for this shit, wheres the double barrell chicks?