A Good time to Die

dontenn

War Hero
With the Government disposal of contaminated bodies via the crem and no members of families unable to attend and no costs to fork out, well that will do for me, being the tight fisted Yorkie or so I am told. Would you like a state paid send off I know I would.
 
Good question. I might take advantage of this offer in a couple of weeks, even though no bugger can attend my funeral anyway.
 

BratMedic

LE
Book Reviewer
They would for the free drink.

And to point and laugh as I got cremmed.
So who's going to give you viaticum? You won't go upstairs to your heaven with baby jebus if you don't get it will you? ;)
 

Joker62

ADC
Book Reviewer
MiL died just over 2 weeks before the lockdown, funeral was arranged for 07/04/20 - cost £4500, directors rang the other day, can't do the funeral thing so it's crem at 21:30 tomorrow, no attendees, just the hearse (I'm thinking Transit van here), 4 pall bearers and the oven - cost £1600.
 
So who's going to give you viaticum? You won't go upstairs to your heaven with baby jebus if you don't get it will you? ;)
I carry a card with me, telling anyone who finds my lifeless carcass to contact the local priest, and a list of other things I want done.
 
I carry a card with me, telling anyone who finds my lifeless carcass to contact the local priest, and a list of other things I want done.
Yeah. Like anyone is going to bother with that shit.

Go through your pockets for cash/loose change/tabs, then off with your boots and roll you into a ditch.

3 minutes start to finish.
 
I carry a card with me, telling anyone who finds my lifeless carcass to contact the local priest, and a list of other things I want done.

I dunno that you'll find a priest into necrophilia




well not at short notice anyway
 
Yeah. Like anyone is going to bother with that shit.

Go through your pockets for cash/loose change/tabs, then off with your boots and roll you into a ditch.

3 minutes start to finish.
They can't. We live in a respectful society, and they must honour the social contract. That means no nicking cash, bank cards, pills, jewelry or sundry items.

I dunno that you'll find a priest into necrophilia

well not at short notice anyway
Taking sexual advantage of my vulnerable carcass is also to be frowned upon.
 

ExREME..TECH

On ROPS
On ROPs
Yeah. Like anyone is going to bother with that shit.

Go through your pockets for cash/loose change/tabs, then off with your boots and roll you into a ditch.

3 minutes start to finish.
Watch and ears?
 

BratMedic

LE
Book Reviewer
You all forgot to get his gold teeth FFS. Amateurs!
 
before that can you refer us to another batshit-cray god botherer to replace you?
He doesn't have to be that crazy - I mean like believing god's mother was a virgin.
Just entertaining with a good sense of humour, like you. Oh and a bit less of a homophobic obsessive would be OK too.
 
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ExREME..TECH

On ROPS
On ROPs
Watch? Good spot-you've done this before.

Ears? Can't eat them, smoke them nor spend them. Meh.
You dry they and use them when playing the cards, snap, one ear equals 2 pints
 

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