69 reasons to go Lesbo...

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by spike7451, Aug 7, 2008.

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  1. spike7451

    spike7451 RIP

    Dunno if this has been done before.
    Found here;lesbi friends

    1. You don’t have to worry about gagging from a “deep throat job”
    2. You never have to worry about finding the toilet seat up
    3. You can fix your own car and get your hair done within the same afternoon
    4. Your orgasms are real. Always. And so are hers.
    5. You never have to swallow.
    6. You never have to worry about facial hair touching you, anywhere.
    7. No one cares if you don’t wear a bra.
    8. You can wear a dick and use it better than most guys
    9. Foreplay is an art
    10. You are your own form of birth control
    11. Women smell amazing
    12. You don’t feel like a piece of meat, when she checks you out
    13. You can cuddle without feeling like you have to “put out”
    14. You find a woman’s intellect to be sexy
    15. You watch porn for entertainment purposes
    16. You feel bad for strippers
    17. Orgasms are like Cornucopias – they should called the horn of plenty
    18. You never have to worry about breaking a nail, because you don’t have any
    19. You can pretty much have sex anywhere, at anytime, while flying completely under the radar
    20. Sex in public bathrooms is so much easier
    21. 69ing is so much more fun (and a lot easier too) Hillbilly
    22. I love the smell of a woman
    23. I get to do the motor boat in my girlfriend’s fabulous tits every day!
    24. I love the emotional availability of a woman
    25. I love the nurturing care a woman offers
    26. I love watching my girlfriend get ready for a night on the town – watching her get out of the shower naked, put on her perfume, do her makeup
    27. I like the feel of a soft pussy over a hard, intrusive penis
    28. I love cuddling and feeling my girlfriend’s soft skin
    29. I love kissing a woman’s soft lips (yes, both of them – cuz I know that’s what you’re thinking!)
    30. I get to have a best friend and a partner all in one
    31. I get to wear her clothes and use her make-up!!! Dubbs
    32. great nicknames…like carpet muncher
    33. sex on a first date…without fear of pregnancy
    34. “no man’s ever going to tell ME what to do!”
    35. it’s like dating yourself 36. double the wardrobe, double the FUN!
    37. WAY less body hair
    38. no spooging in your face
    39. women taste better
    40. especially the vegan ones
    41. one word…BOOBIES!!!
    42. “we were just switching clothes, officer!”
    43. No 2 clits are alike!
    44. Women make sexier bedroom noises
    45. Lingerie you can BOTH wear!
    46. Double headed dildos
    47. The ultimate in feminism
    48. Chick flicks are just movies in a lesbians house
    49. better kisses
    50. no scratchy faces
    51. you LIKE when she grabs your ass
    52. if it really came down to it, you could totally find SOME dude who’d pay to watch you go down on your girlfriend
    53. women don’t pass out after orgasms
    54. you can do her front ways, back ways, and side ways cuz the wrist moves freer than the hips
    55. fingers always fit
    56. never having to deal with “morning wood”
    57. less farting…which I don’t actually know is true but women do not take pride in it
    58. you could call her your “roommate” and it’s ok Paula the Surf Mom
    59. premature ejaculation? what IS that?
    60. Eating pussy is good for the complexion… it always makes mine pretty rosy any way.
    61. The trashman never sees used condoms in your trash when he hauls it away.
    62. If you work it right you and your partner never have to buy your own drinks when you go out… all you have to do it make out… the guys in the bar will just keep em coming just so you keep it going.
    63. Lesbians know that you can do more with your fingers then send text messages.
    64. Somebody will always has a tampon in an emergency
    65. And your partner won’t get all embarrassed if you send them to the store to get you some.
    66. You are very popular… girls like lesbians, they all want to kiss us….guys like lesbians, they all want to watch movies about us… everybody likes lesbians.
    67. Two mommies in the house are always better then one daddy on the golf course
    68. You are sure somebody can cook
    69. It good to have a partner who has a sense of fashion
  2. 70. No need to feel depressed because you're too fat and ugly to pull a bloke.
  3. What is "spooging"?
  4. A bit like "spaffing" I'd imagine?
  5. At least 6 or so of them are repeats.

    So 63 reasons then. Typical Dorii !
  6. I'd have to agree with no.27
  7. not good enough reasons for me, think i will stick to blokes, fingers are no compensation for the real thing.
  8. old_fat_and_hairy

    old_fat_and_hairy LE Book Reviewer Reviews Editor

    I'm not sure it was fingers that were meant.
  9. 70. Dungarees come in a number of loose fitting and unflattering sizes!
  10. 71. You can both be "in season" at the same time, so can't complain at each other's fetid clout stench.
  11. I meant it to read as this.....
    I like to feel a nice soft pussy as opposed to feeling a chap's old chap.

    I think i'd better shut up now as i seem to have already been branded as batting for Lancashire on another thread.
  12. 72
    Cernunnos will write nasty things about you.

    PS Any update on him yet?
  13. slightly off track,having no problem with the gay thing at all, but why do they have these march's, if these people strive/want to be accepted as "normal" and no different from anybody else, why do they feel the urge to go on a march wearing a pink tutu or ymca outfits, how many in a day do you see wearing that.
    may be a march for hetro's should take place.
  14. I take issue with 37.
  15. OK. As a Yorkshire born MAN who likes WOMEN i can categorically state you are right in thinking that i like a bit of muff but you may not call me Flintoff (or any other Lanc. name you may think of.)