5 Steps To Economic Success By G. Brown

#1
1. A group of Bank Managers fuck up the economy of the world.
2. Brown gives them tax payers money for banks to lend back to the tax payers and charge them interest on.
3. Banks say - thank you Mr Dick Head - now fuck off... on postcard from somewhere sunny.
4. Brown not happy that banks have taken large bucket of piss and done one with money, so quickly learns from lesson.
5. Brown gives banks more tax payers money for them to lend to the tax payers.

You've got to give it to Brown. He really has his finger on the pulse of human understanding.

What a complete and total w@nker of the highest possible order. The best thing that could happen is if the complete and utter cnut tops himself.

Go Brown - do the fukkin world a favor and kill yourself. Die Die Die!!!
 
#2
Also: two steps to electoral success by G Brown:

1. Identify that the countries current economic circumstances are absolutely nothing to do with the Government, global phenonomen, beyond our control, not our fault etc etc;
2. Claim that any improvement in the current economic circumstances are everything to do with the Government, due to rapid and far seeing intervention at a national level, under control, brownie points for us please etc etc.

Does he take us all for total retards? Fcuking throbber.
 
#3
It's not that bad really - some labour Baroness sees green shoots of recovery and a labour MP is urging us to buy houses now because prices will be booming again soon.
 
#4
This money we are giving the banks should either mean we own the banks (ie us the taxpayer-nationalised) or the banks pay the tax payer mit interetse for the "loan".

That is what should be happening.
 
#5
chocolate_frog said:
This money we are giving the banks should either mean we own the banks (ie us the taxpayer-nationalised) or the banks pay the tax payer mit interetse for the "loan".

That is what should be happening.
Aye, but who wants to own a business that is failing and is run by a bunch of corrupt thieving bastards?
 
#6
Step 6 - Create a financial institution called 'Toxic Bank PLC', stick all the dodgy loans and debts in there that have no hope of being repaid and underwrite it by the taxpayer with money you don't have in the first place. Pat yourself on the back and tell the Great British Public that if we don't do this then UK PLC will collapse.
 
#7
BanjoBill said:
chocolate_frog said:
This money we are giving the banks should either mean we own the banks (ie us the taxpayer-nationalised) or the banks pay the tax payer mit interetse for the "loan".

That is what should be happening.
Aye, but who wants to own a business that is failing and is run by a bunch of corrupt thieving bastards?
Why not? We have a country run much the same way.
 

Biped

LE
Book Reviewer
#8
mnairb said:
Step 6 - Create a financial institution called 'Toxic Bank PLC', stick all the dodgy loans and debts in there that have no hope of being repaid and underwrite it by the taxpayer with money you don't have in the first place. Pat yourself on the back and tell the Great British Public that if we don't do this then UK PLC will collapse.
Better still; instead of telling the public that it's THEY who are saving the economy with their money, it's actually the astute financial prudence and prowess of Gordon Brown that is saving the banks.

What would you think if I went to, say, my parents who were struggling financially, and said to them "OK, you're struggling financially, so the best thing I can do is take your pension off you and give it to that guy who's offered to tarmac your drive for £20,000, and yes, I know it's because he tarmacked last time that you are now poorer, but trust me, you'll thank me for making you better off."
 
#9
Biped said:
"OK, you're struggling financially, so the best thing I can do is take your pension off you and give it to that guy who's offered to tarmac your drive for £20,000, and yes, I know it's because he tarmacked last time that you are now poorer, but trust me, you'll thank me for making you better off."
That actually summarises it perfectly.

Bank Managers = Pikeys In Suits.

Honestly, I'm so fukkin angry about this, I would willingly cut Harriet Harmon's fat ugly slut head off and beat Brown to death with it. Wipe the blood from my brow then go for a pint.
 
#10
Better go for a pint quick. With the govt planning some 'Quantative Easing' ala Zimbabwe stylee it'll be twice the price in half the time.

Personally I'm taking all my savings and setting up a hand cart business.... there be plenty of us riding them to hell soon enough.
 
#11
what woudl happen insteand of giving all that money to greedy cnut banks, if they just gave it to every tax payign adult? Surely that would "quantatively ease" when a big chunk of £30m people went on a car and widescren plasma spending spree, (jump starting business turnover) paid off a chunk of their mortgage (recapitalised banks and reduced exposure) or saved it (recapitalise banks and rebalance loan vs assets.

Then leaving banks to COMPETE for our business, not treat people like lepers which passing on large cash pressies to themselves. Where is the fecking interest cut from banks on the last base rate reduction? You thieves were upping the rate based on the bank base rate when you wanted to, so why not now?

Giving money to a failing business is what the government is doing, and it doesnt appear to make any difference.

So how about give it to us, and see how good of a job we do?
 
#12
Papa_Lazarou said:
what woudl happen insteand of giving all that money to greedy cnut banks, if they just gave it to every tax payign adult? Surely that would "quantatively ease" when a big chunk of £30m people went on a car and widescren plasma spending spree, (jump starting business turnover) paid off a chunk of their mortgage (recapitalised banks and reduced exposure) or saved it (recapitalise banks and rebalance loan vs assets.

Then leaving banks to COMPETE for our business, not treat people like lepers which passing on large cash pressies to themselves. Where is the fecking interest cut from banks on the last base rate reduction? You thieves were upping the rate based on the bank base rate when you wanted to, so why not now?

Giving money to a failing business is what the government is doing, and it doesnt appear to make any difference.

So how about give it to us, and see how good of a job we do?
Unfortunately because we now make feck all here all that dosh would head Eastwards during our spending spree.
 
#13
I wouldn't mind but I just opened a stack of post today only to discover my pension is worth less then I have paid into it (I suspected as much but it still hits home when its confirmed). My bank wants to charge me £6 for having the audacity to want to deposit money into my account from abroad (WTF? I thought they need capital!) and American Express have decided that £150 for the pleasure of having their card which is accepted f#cking nowhere is not enough so they're jacking up their interest rates to the square root of a small African countries GDP.

I'm going home to remove all the light bulbs, don my hairsuit and sit in a bucket of cold water to cheer me up.
 
#14
WalterWarry said:
Papa_Lazarou said:
what woudl happen insteand of giving all that money to greedy cnut banks, if they just gave it to every tax payign adult? Surely that would "quantatively ease" when a big chunk of £30m people went on a car and widescren plasma spending spree, (jump starting business turnover) paid off a chunk of their mortgage (recapitalised banks and reduced exposure) or saved it (recapitalise banks and rebalance loan vs assets.

Then leaving banks to COMPETE for our business, not treat people like lepers which passing on large cash pressies to themselves. Where is the fecking interest cut from banks on the last base rate reduction? You thieves were upping the rate based on the bank base rate when you wanted to, so why not now?

Giving money to a failing business is what the government is doing, and it doesnt appear to make any difference.

So how about give it to us, and see how good of a job we do?
Unfortunately because we now make feck all here all that dosh would head Eastwards during our spending spree.
And that mate is just another of this governments fuck ups. When Maggie was in power she provided grants to new manufacturing business, rate cuts and incentives for British people to build British and buy British.

Now of course since the socialist junta have taken over and pissed all her hard work up against the wall. We no longer have a manufacturing industry, just a service industry.

So whilst I agree with PL of Royston Vasey, that giving it to the people and not the banks seems more logical. It is only a matter of time before it all ends up in some Southeast Asian sweat shop.

This cnut Brown really genuinely has completely fucked up and created a monumental and historically unequal mess of British finances. Far too busy thinking up the next complete and utter waste of time law, rather than keeping an eye on what we pay the bastards to do.

Really, honestly... give me the right to do so and a HMG and I would take great delight in eliminating the bastards.

Still fukkin angry. Angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry angry ..........
 
#15
Does it now mean that if we IE the great joe public own most of the shares in the banks that as a share holder I can tell my bank to poke the overdraft /interest charges as i sort of own them??????????????
 
#16
So BanjoBill, I take it you are a bit angry? So am I to tell the truth.
But what you gonna do about it? Me? I can't think of a single fooking thing that I can do to make a difference in this mess.
 
#17
jagman said:
So BanjoBill, I take it you are a bit angry? So am I to tell the truth.
But what you gonna do about it? Me? I can't think of a single fooking thing that I can do to make a difference in this mess.
Think I'll do what I've always done mate. I'll respond to the recent downturn by working fucking harder and wondering what it must feel like to have a decent pension and the potential to have a retirement.

All was looking good til the pikeys in suits fukked us over, now this one eyed cowboy is feeding them and ignoring the real money makers. I'd love to hang the fat scottish twat from an oak tree and swing on his legs.

Still fucking angry.
 
#18
I dont mean to break it to you boys but he will probably get voted in come the next election. Its something I've been thinking about over and over and after several suicide attempts have finally come to terms with. I am a Conservative but this is how i see it playing out:

Voter 1 - 'Election time yeah, theres no way Im voting for you Brown you utter tw@t, but wait a minute I cant vote for Cameron. Surely he wouldn't get us out of this mess what with him being a posh b@stard and riding a bicycle and that. Then again what would the lib dems do if they got into power? Surely it would spell doom for humanity and we would revert to some sort of pre-historic lifestyle. Ah sh1t I'll just vote for Brown maybe he will top himself or die of heart attack and at least then I would have actually voted him in to rape this country, therefore giving me piece of mind.'

Voter 2 - 'I really cant be fcuked to vote'
 
#19
Guy in work today was cashing up all his savings and pension to buy gold. After he'd offski'd another bloke came in who had tried the same trick last week. The office he went to was sold out, Krug's, Sov's, Eagles, Guinea's and Bar.

And now the Gobmint is printing monopoly money like the Russians are in Porstmouth. 'The pound in your pocket'. Same Old Labour - same old lies.
 

Top