5 Rnds, in your own time, carry on. Firing squad straw poll.

#1
Ok, you have a Lee Enfield .303. You are NCO i/c of a firing squad but you have the power to bring into your sights anyone you choose. Who would it be? Lets make it a top five.

Heres mine;

1. Anyone who is a paid up member of the Liarbour party (obviously).
2. Anyone who considers the thought 'Lets sort our problems out on the Trisha show'.
3. Anyone who spends more time on their image than their personality (anyone under the age of 26 and any bloke that has a haircut that looks like he doesnt give a fcuk but actually spends more time than a doris preening himself to give the impression that he 'doesnt give a fcuk').
4. Anyone who drives a Mercedes/BMW/Ford with alot of optional extras/MPV/French car/the tosser who cut me up this morning. (Dumb cnut-2 1/2 tons of 4X4 V8 death versus Rover 200/MG ZR mit baseball cap....No brainer. Wish I'd turned in and squashed the chav now, would have prevented benifit payments and stopped the gene pool becoming shallower than a puddle in Romford high street).
5. Anyone who makes a real life comparison to a soap opera and their own life....and takes it seriously.

(Due to my PNHRSD.....psuedo Napolionic hate ridden snobbery disorder, I hate all living species from the genus Homosapian and would wish all forms of humanity destroyed to enable us to start again by my fav method; small bomb, big cloud. Therefore, I have rationed myself and you lot to only five catagories).

Oh, happy feckin Easter, you bunch of sheep like his :roll:
 
#2
Feckwit chav tosspots who park in disabled parking bays because it's 5 feet closer to the shops, wankers
 
#3
somebody upset you last night ? :wink:
 
#4
Have you thought of prozac ?
My starter for five That greek cowardly pouf who is letting the ta down.
An animal right protestor anyone will do
dito pro lifer
Barnie
Wanna be lefty student radical scum
 
#5
The Lord Flasheart said:
Oh, happy feckin Easter, you bunch of sheep like his :roll:
Easter? Appropriately a quick name check of the 1871 Census for Scotland , shows there are 25 people registered in the census with the surname Easter, 8 named Egg and 5 named Bunny.
 
#7
By happy coincidence, there were five little c*nts whizzzing up and down my street last night on those horrible little flatulent-sounding micro-motorbike things.
 
#8
Think Flash might have had a drink last night.

The plus side of a fully stoked up Lee Enfield is that the round will probably pass through more than one body there fore more people on the list could be slotted.

Saying that I would probably just settle for shooting Bonnie Langford in the face 5 times......... God I fcuking hate her.
 
#9
jacques chirac,
students,
welsh rugby players
 
#10
Tosspot singers "releasing" "charity" records in a vain attempt to resurrect their flagging careers by proving how fecking caring they are.

Ditto wank wannabes that have "won" a TV talentless contest releasing cover versions of classic songs (will young doing elvis WTF)

If we line all the feckwits up in a line, how many of the feckers could we slot ??


Mick "i'm a ginger twat who wishes he was black" Hucknel (tied to Tom "homeboy" westwood)

Any bald halfwit with a pony tail, you've got no fecking hair, get over it.

Daz
 

Cutaway

LE
Kit Reviewer
#11
A straw poll eh ?

I think that kicks it off nicely.

01. - Jack Straw aka The Great Satan
02. - Bliar all family members & anyone who has ever thought of him without the word 'wnaker'
03. - Two Jabs Prescott
04. - Grasping Gordon, possibly the most totally unhinged Porridge Wogs.
05. - Any MP that would ever dream of voting for anything any of the above has ever said.

As MDN said, the advantage of the 303 is that we can line them up and slot a group at a time.
The above list is just for my 1st rd, although serials 02 and 05 might be pushing the penetration of the 7Z a bit.
Also serial 03 might need a rd all of it's own.
More to come when I calm down.
 
B

Biscuits_AB

Guest
#12
The Lord Flasheart said:
Ok, you have a Lee Enfield .303. You are NCO i/c of a firing squad but you have the power to bring into your sights anyone you choose. Who would it be? Lets make it a top five.

Heres mine;

1. Anyone who is a paid up member of the Liarbour party (obviously).
2. Anyone who considers the thought 'Lets sort our problems out on the Trisha show'.
3. Anyone who spends more time on their image than their personality (anyone under the age of 26 and any bloke that has a haircut that looks like he doesnt give a fcuk but actually spends more time than a doris preening himself to give the impression that he 'doesnt give a fcuk').
4. Anyone who drives a Mercedes/BMW/Ford with alot of optional extras/MPV/French car/the tosser who cut me up this morning. (Dumb cnut-2 1/2 tons of 4X4 V8 death versus Rover 200/MG ZR mit baseball cap....No brainer. Wish I'd turned in and squashed the chav now, would have prevented benifit payments and stopped the gene pool becoming shallower than a puddle in Romford high street).
5. Anyone who makes a real life comparison to a soap opera and their own life....and takes it seriously.

(Due to my PNHRSD.....psuedo Napolionic hate ridden snobbery disorder, I hate all living species from the genus Homosapian and would wish all forms of humanity destroyed to enable us to start again by my fav method; small bomb, big cloud. Therefore, I have rationed myself and you lot to only five catagories).

Oh, happy feckin Easter, you bunch of sheep like his :roll:
You drive an MG 200? Fookin' hell.
 
B

Biscuits_AB

Guest
#13
bernoulli said:
By happy coincidence, there were five little c*nts whizzzing up and down my street last night on those horrible little flatulent-sounding micro-motorbike things.
Try tying a bit of wire over the width of the road. Problem solved.
 
#14
1.France
2.The Liarbour Party
3.Islamic Fundalmentalists
4.Ant & Dec
5.Lucky the dog (More Than Insurance Commercial)
 
#17
1. The Thieving Gypo B*stards who broke into my van this week stealing £1000 pounds worth of power and hand tools. :evil: (for this would I be allowed a Browning M2HB and 1000 rounds?)
2. Graham Norton
3. Peter Andre and Jordan (Aka Katie Price)
4. Anyone that works for the tabloid press and keeps non-entietys like those above in the papers.
5. The entire cast of eastenders
 
#18
Anyone that has ever appeared on any Sky channel.

In fact, can we forget about the 303 rounds and just bayonet the cnuts in the face?
 
#19
I would like 5 participants of channel 4's 'The Games', not including Kirsty Gallacher.

I'm on holiday in Cornwall at the moment, and therefore have no access to my muck stash.

Imagine my delighted surprise when, shortly after my wife went to bed, I was treated to the wonderful sight of Kirsty bonging like fcuk on a trampoline.

Knowing that the w-ank window was short, I got down to it quickly. Right at the vinegars, the camera flicked from Bernards lass giving herself 2 black eyes, to Craig Charles on a concept2 rower.

"AAAAAARRRGGGH" I shouted . Though wood diminished almost immediately, it left me with the unsettling feeling of being faintly queggish for an unfunny, fat scouser.
 
#20
1. The cock in the comedy red hat who got me kicked out of Walkabout last night in Bristol. Was it you??
2. The cock who knocked over my beer last night in Edwards Bar in Bristol. Again, was it you?
3. The cock who walked off with the fit Danish bird i was trying to pull last night.
4. The girl who said i looked "just like David Coulthard" whilst i was chatting her up.
5. Micheal Jackson
 

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