Last week was my 40th birthday and I really didn't feel like waking up that morning. I managed to pull myself together and go downstairs for breakfast, hoping my wife would be pleasant and say, "Happy Birthday!" and possibly have a small present for me. As it turned out, she barely said good morning, let alone "Happy Birthday." I thought... Well, that's marriage for you, but the kids... they'll remember. My kids came trampling down the stairs to breakfast, ate their breakfast, but didn't say a word to me. So when I made it out of the house and started for work, I felt pretty despondent. As I walked into my office, my secretary Joanne said, "Good Morning Boss and by the way Happy Birthday!" It felt a bit better knowing that at least someone remembered. I worked in a zombie like fashion until about one o'clock, when Joanne knocked on my door and said, "You know, it's such a beautiful day outside and it's your Birthday, why don't we go out for lunch, just you and me." I said, "Thanks, Joanne, that's the best thing I've heard all day, let's go!" We went to lunch but not where we'd normally go. Instead she took me to a quiet bistro with a private table. We had a couple of mixed drinks and I enjoyed the meal tremendously. On the way back to the office, Joanne said seductively, "You know, It's such a beautiful day... We don't have to go right back to the office, do we?" I replied with "I suppose not. What do you have in mind?" She said, "Let's go to mine, it's just around the corner." After arriving at her place, Joanne turned to me and said, "Boss if you don't mind, I'm goinna to step into the bedroom and get more comfortable, I'll be right back." "Ok." I nervously replied. She went into the bedroom and after a few minutes, she came out carrying a huge birthday cake... Followed by my wife, my kids and dozens of my friends and co-workers, all singing "Happy Birthday". And I just sat there... Stunned... On the couch... Bollock naked... With a hard on.