40 Over 40

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Furryturd, Jul 9, 2010.

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  1. I just saw an advert on the TV saying that 40% of men over 40 have suffered erectile disfunction.

    I know what they mean.

    There is a short fat bird at work with cracking arrse who gives me an unexpected hard-on at least once a week.

    Also, my erection likes to go in places it is not supposed to like throats and colons.

    Anyone else got a disfuntional erection?

  2. Does a wonky shed count as a disfunctional erection???
  3. Its not the erection itself that is disfunctional, BC junior just wants to be happy and pop out occasionally, the disfunctional element is when you are witnessing a horrendous RTA and he wants to say hello to everybody.
  4. Disfunctional as in watching you polish your shoes instead of proudly watching you shave?
  5. Once I hit 40, I didn't remember 40% of the people I met once p1ssed, didn't remember taking at least 40% of them back to the sack and definitely wouldn't remember at least 40% (possibly closer to 99%) the day after.

    It's fcuking brilliant, I don't have to do the "shifty shuffle" when I bump into them in the supermarket or a pub after, I just wonder why they are smiling at me and then looking at me a bit strangely when I slide away with a blank expression on my face.

    Getting older is ace, you get to act like a kid and then genuinely not know why you should feel guilty.

    As for the impotence, in real men only massive manly amounts of Ale can cause that, anything else is a sign from God that you are a gayer.
  6. TFFT, Stella heaven since 10 past 7.
  7. Once you get married and over 40 it can be double trouble :(
  8. I once erected a tower crane that was disfunctional but apart from that my John Thomas is in perfect working order apart from when I'm on the vino or if the rugby or football is on.
  9. Normall find the genital monster comes to life after having a nap in the passenger seat of a 4T no wonder Jarrod bought one
  10. I'm obviously getting stronger with age. A long time ago, when I was young and fit, I couldn't bend my pork sword when it was excited. Now I can.

  11. A phenomena well known to the average Brit squaddie and known as "convoy cock".
  12. Worse still the ad for some anti pishing yourself tablets.Is that all I have left to look forwards too?
  13. Yes, but 25lbs of ANAL blasting through your nether regions does that.
  14. Did he fall for this as a chat up line?

  15. Ah yes,experienced many a time in a tennie.