22 years old with a child and one on the way! Should I join?

#1
Im 22 and based in Dublin. Finding it impossible to find any work in Ireland now. I have always considered a career in the British Army. Unfortunately when i was younger i was always put off joining by my family. I know i should not have listened.

I now have a 1 year old son and an unplanned second child on the way. My partner is not terribly keen on moving to the UK. But i think she could be convinced.

I really want to join to the extent that I have really been putting in a lot of tme in the gym in the past 2/3 months. Iv gone from doing 1.5miles in 20mins!! to no doing it in 13mins. Should have it down to 11mins by christmas.

Would anyone recommend joining the Army in my situation?
 
#2
Ehmm i would have to say NO. Not being nasty but, you have a 1 year old son and another kid on the way, Your role in life now is to look after your kids as a Parent and make sure they are ok. If you were realy keen on joining the army then you should of when you were not a parent. You should not have listened to your familly cause its YOUR life and it wasyour choice to listen, so realy it your fault for not joining. You cant think for what you want now as instead you have to think about how it will effect your kids not seeing their parent alot etc etc... Why not try the TA ? get a bit of both worlds. Hope you dont think im being nasty. Ryan.
 
#3
lgnd-bev said:
Ehmm i would have to say NO. Not being nasty but, you have a 1 year old son and another kid on the way, Your role in life now is to look after your kids as a Parent and make sure they are ok. If you were realy keen on joining the army then you should of when you were not a parent. You should not have listened to your familly cause its YOUR life and it wasyour choice to listen, so realy it your fault for not joining. You cant think for what you want now as instead you have to think about how it will effect your kids not seeing their parent alot etc etc... Why not try the TA ? get a bit of both worlds. Hope you dont think im being nasty. Ryan.
Erm, I think SHE is a HE. :p

rgds said:
My partner is not terribly keen on moving to the UK. But i think she could be convinced.
 
#5
skintboymike said:
lgnd-bev said:
Ehmm i would have to say NO. Not being nasty but, you have a 1 year old son and another kid on the way, Your role in life now is to look after your kids as a Parent and make sure they are ok. If you were realy keen on joining the army then you should of when you were not a parent. You should not have listened to your familly cause its YOUR life and it wasyour choice to listen, so realy it your fault for not joining. You cant think for what you want now as instead you have to think about how it will effect your kids not seeing their parent alot etc etc... Why not try the TA ? get a bit of both worlds. Hope you dont think im being nasty. Ryan.
Erm, I think SHE is a HE. :p

rgds said:
My partner is not terribly keen on moving to the UK. But i think she could be convinced.
haha i miss read it :oops: not on the ball tonight at all ! 8O
 
#6
If re-locating to UK is a drama how about the Irish Defence Forces? Not sure what their optempo is like but you may also be more likely to spend more time with the sprogs and missus, no bad thing with a young family.
 
#7
lgnd-bev said:
Ehmm i would have to say NO. Not being nasty but, you have a 1 year old son and another kid on the way, Your role in life now is to look after your kids as a Parent and make sure they are ok. If you were realy keen on joining the army then you should of when you were not a parent. You should not have listened to your familly cause its YOUR life and it wasyour choice to listen, so realy it your fault for not joining. You cant think for what you want now as instead you have to think about how it will effect your kids not seeing their parent alot etc etc... Why not try the TA ? get a bit of both worlds. Hope you dont think im being nasty. Ryan.
Where`s the nearest TA drill hall to Dublin?
 
#8
lgnd-bev said:
Your role in life now is to look after your kids as a mother and make sure they are ok. If you were realy keen on joining the army then you should of when you were not a mother.
rgds said:
My partner is not terribly keen on moving to the UK. But i think she could be convinced
Either (a) you've misread the post lgnd-bev (b) rgds is a lesbian...I'm thinking it's the former.

Regardless of that, even if rdgs was female why should a mother not join the army? So long as the mother has a good support network, someone to care for the child and fully understands and accepts that she will spend a lot of time away from the child then there is no reason for her not to join. Your comment of "your role in life..." smacks of sexism. Is a father's role in life not to look after his kids? Get out the victorian era. :roll:

Edit: Oops beaten to it...
 
#9
Go for it, it can be hard starting with young kids but its worth it, the kids will grow up knowing more of life than they otherwise would.
 
#10
I go to ATR pirbright for phase 1 at the end of this month, I have 3 step children and my partner is heavily pregnant with our son. This has not put me off joining the army if anything it has reinforced my decision to join up. It is not easy for my girlfriend knowing im off soon but she is fully behind me and supports my choice 110%. If your partner can be fully behind you then go for it. The army is not a career just for single people with no ties, It is just as suitable for familes.
 
#11
Understand that if you do join you won't see much of your kids to begin with, and you will do long stints away. If this doesn't put you off, welcome aboard. After all, it's better to be a squaddie dad who's hardly ever home than an underage chav/gangstarappa dad who vanishes off the face of the earth before the sprog's dropped. Good luck.
 
#12
Just to clarify I am a Male!! :D

The Irish Defence Forces will not be recruiting for the forseeable future due to a Public and Civil Service recruitment freeze in Ireland. And to be honest the Irish Army does not offer anything like the British Army does.

My great grandfather fought during WW1 and i have three Great Uncles who fought in WW2. My grandfather also served 4 years in the British Army. So even though they were all Englishmen It Would be an honour to continue that legacy.
 
#14
I start pirbright in a week - 2 kids - we don't want my missus to work so she can bring the kids up properly and i want a challenge - we went through all the same thoughts as you have and almost ditched the idea when work offered to up pay to make me stay. We're dead excited now and want to up sticks to germany as soon as possible. Go for it and good luck
 
#15
know how you feel fella, i had an application in last january to join but then my fiancee fell pregenant so i withdrew. my little one is now 11 months old and im away to basic at catterick in february 21st. will i miss my litte princess? yes. however i work in a call centre just now as a manager and earn a good wage but...its not a STABLE career whereas the army is. life is full of sacrafices and this is one which i must make. as stated above us as fathers are here to provide and financialy support our families which a career in the army will sustaine. these are my beliefs and i hope you make the correct choice for you and your family and all the best fella. john
 
#16
I have to say i appreciate all the positive comments. Cheers Lads.

To be honest I think Im just going to have to convince my partner that its the right choice. Its not just about the financial stability (allthough this is a very important factor) But also about whats best for me with regards to my career. I know it will be extremely tough but I need a real challenge.

Trying to sell x amount of products per day to reach sales targets is not what i consider a challenge. I want a real challenge. I want my children to have a father to be proud of.

So fuuck it i think i will go for it.
 

DieHard

LE
Book Reviewer
#17
The army will help your wife and the other wives will too i joind when my girlfriend was pregnant but unfortunatly spit a few weeks before starting basic i ended up with 5 kids throughout my time in , sure you will miss them , but the questtion you should be asking yourself is do i really really wanna join up,asking others for advice is good and i applaud you for asking, but joining up is a very big commitment and you have to be aware of what you need to put into it with the worry of your spouse in the background. If you join i wish you all the best if not dont be ashamed you may wanna wait untill your kids are a bit older its a huge choice but as you already kow at the end of the day is up to you and your mrs, without her 100% backing you wont stand a chance , so sit with her talk with her and take her concerns and wishes into account. GOOD LUCK whichever way yuo choose
 

CountryGal

MIA
Book Reviewer
#18
Your family cicrumstances shouldnt put you off, BUT you will need her full commitment to the idea, its a hard thing to leave your family and she will need to be working with you to make the sacrifices needed to keep the relationship together too, So sit down with her, and get her full backing and then go for it, Good luck to you both.

Get her to join the rear party section of the site as well ;o)
 
#20
lgnd-bev said:
Ehmm i would have to say NO. Not being nasty but, you have a 1 year old son and another kid on the way, Your role in life now is to look after your kids as a Parent and make sure they are ok. If you were realy keen on joining the army then you should of when you were not a parent. You should not have listened to your familly cause its YOUR life and it wasyour choice to listen, so realy it your fault for not joining. You cant think for what you want now as instead you have to think about how it will effect your kids not seeing their parent alot etc etc... Why not try the TA ? get a bit of both worlds. Hope you dont think im being nasty. Ryan.
Are you some sort of cnut?

How many soldiers are in the Army AND are parents? Will you leave when you spawn (or whatever it is you do to reproduce)?

To the OP, go for it. Try joining the British or Irish Armys. Just remember, that it may be a harder asjustment for you because of the kids, you may have to struggle a bit on a very low wage (as most recruits only have their d1ck to keep), but just think of the pluses. Eap for you kids, boarding school allowance, very good SCE schools in overseas tours, etc.

You might want to seriously consider marrying your significant other (I am asuming here that you aren't married), because you wont get a family quaerter without a legit marriage.
 

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