2 BUILDERS

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Jokes' started by LazyCaretaker, Sep 13, 2010.

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  1. Two builders (Phil and Eric) are seated either side of a table in a rough
    > pub when a well-dressed man enters, orders a beer and sits on a stool at
    >the bar.
    >
    > The two builders start to speculate about the occupation of the suit.
    >
    > Phil: - I reckon he's an accountant.
    >
    > Eric: - No way - he's a stockbroker.
    >
    > Phil: - He ain't no stockbroker! A stockbroker wouldn't come in here!
    >
    > The argument repeats itself for some time until the volume of beer gets
    >the
    >better of Phil and he makes for the toilet. On entering the toilet he sees
    >that the suit is standing at a urinal. Curiosity and the several beers get
    >the better of the builder.
    >
    > Phil: - Scuse me.... no offence meant, but me and me mate were wondering
    >what you do for a living?
    >
    > Suit: - No offence taken! I'm a Logical Scientist by profession.
    >
    > Phil: - Oh ! What's that then?
    >
    > Suit: - I'll try to explain by example.... Do you have a goldfish at
    >home?
    >
    > Phil: - Er .. mmm . well yeah, I do as it happens!
    >
    > Suit: - Well, it's logical to follow that you keep it in a bowl or in a
    >pond. Which is it?
    >
    > Phil: - It's in a pond!
    >
    > Suit: - Well then it's reasonable to suppose that you have a large garden
    >then?
    >
    >Phil: - As it happens, yes I have got a big garden!
    >
    >Suit: - Well then it's logical to assume that in this town if you have a
    >large garden then you have a large house?
    >
    > Phil: - As it happens I've got a five bedroom house...built it myself!
    >
    > Suit: - Well given that you've built a five bedroom house it is logical
    >to
    >assume that you haven't built it just for yourself and that you are quite
    >probably married?
    >
    > Phil: - Yes I am married, I live with my wife and three children.
    >
    >Suit: - Well then it is logical to assume that you are sexually active with
    >your wife on a regular basis?
    >
    > Phil:- Yep! Four nights a week!
    >
    > Suit: - Well then it is logical to suggest that you do not masturbate
    >very
    >often?
    >
    > Phil: - Me? Never
    >
    > Suit: - Well there you are! That's logical science at work!
    >
    > Phil: - How's that then?
    >
    > Suit: - Well from finding out that you had a goldfish, I've told you
    >about
    >your sex life!
    >
    > Phil: - I see! That's pretty impressive...thanks mate!
    >
    > Both leave the toilet and Phil returns to his mate.
    >
    > Eric: - I see the suit was in there. Did you ask him what he does?
    >
    > Phil: - Yep! He's a logical scientist!
    >
    > Eric: - What's that then?
    >
    > Phil: - I'll try and explain. Do you have a goldfish?
    >
    > Eric: - Nope
    >
    > Phil: - Well then, you're a wanker.