16 wanting to join and parental permission needed?

Hey all, im in need for a little advice.

My missus's cousin turns 16 on Monday and wants to join the army (thumbs up to the lad) but his mother wont give him the permission to do so.

His parents are split up, he lives with his mother, and his dad has remarried and lives near him.

My question is:

If his mother wont give him the permission to let him join, can his father give him the permission even though he doesnt live with him?

If not then ive told him to bide his time and join when he turns 18, but he really wants to join up sooner.

Urgent reply needed if poss

Thanks guys!
Just to confirm though?

Is his legal guardian the parent he lives with or even though the parents have both split up, does his father have a say as much as his mother?

It'll be the parent that was appointed as his guardian. I'm presuming that as he's living with his mother then it'll be her.
I dont think they went through the courts, he didnt want them to live with him (about 5 years ago) so they just lived with their mother.

If she is the only one that can give him permission then that will not happen as she is being spitefull about it but i wont get into that lol

you could always check with the AFCO they might know more, but there is a year long course at AFC Harrogate which involves some NVQ's and that if that would be any more likely to convince the mother?
A slightly less traumatic solution that Disco's, Although I do like it.

Have a chat with the mother. We're not talking arm locks and donkey punches.

Show her what the lad will get from his time in AFC Harrogate, and of course the legalitiy bits of him leaving if he doesn't like it. IME it tends to be the parents who think they are signing their kids away for 22 years who have reservations.

Will he be joining as a tradesman? Again the Combat trades such as RAC, Inf and RA don't tend to have same "appeal" to mums as they do the lads.

Unless she is a card carrying loon, she will realise that he will just join when he able to without her consent anyway.

Wont neccesarily follow that she will sign him in, but worth a try. If she doesn't, then chinese burn her in to submission. :D
If he is going for a trade then emphasise the good training and possiblity of job for life after service, then the discipline that goes along with joining up compared to being a possible chav if he doesn't


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These days when couples split up the court does appoint gaurdianship anymore, and both parents retain "parental responsibility", meaning they should both be agreeing to schooling, where the child lives etc etc and therefore either of them could sign - Though this assumes that there wasnt any court applied gaurdian at the time of the seperation and stuff.

Despite the lad only needing one signature, it would prolly be better for someone to speak to the mum and get her onside, rather than the other one sign it and piss her off.

Would want to check with the recruiting officer though, as he should know the definate
Cheers for the responses guys!

Well i dont think talking her the mother would do much good to be honest, especially as there is a lot of friction between her and my mother in law (her sister)

I think its the fact that she is being arkward, as her oldest son turns 18 in October and he is joining the Navy (just needs to book his fitness test) and the fact her youngest wants to sign up too means she will be left on her own...in my opinion she is being selfish as she only thinks about herself.

Plus the youngest that wants to join the Army (he wants to go Infantry) basically wants to leave home as soon as he can as he cannot stand his mother lol.

I think i may speak with a recruitment officer to see if his dad's signature is enough
my advice to you is to tell the lad to look up on some info on what he's wanting to join, ie.. wher his regiemnt is based, wher his training will be, what he will be doing. And get him to show it to his parents to show he is keen on joining ! Thats what i did to get my parents permision cause i have told them everything about what i will be doing. And also tell him to get out training asap cause it will show hes even more keen. Hope it helps mate
He lives with his mum, then she must be the signatory on the 486 consent form. Get the Recruiter or Office manager to talk to her, bottom line is that if he is serious he will join at 18 anyway and hate her too.
Disco said:
If she doesnt support him he can always leave home at 16, move in with his dad and then join up. Has she thought of that?
the best answer and simply the easy solution of this problem. yeah get the AFCO to talk to her- but if all fails do it. why wait if its something he wants to do for his future.

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