12 Days of Christmas - The Emperor Mongs Challenge

Discussion in 'The NAAFI Bar' started by Emperor_Mong, Dec 23, 2007.

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  1. The Emperor Mong wishes it to be know that he has been struck with a dose of Christmas Spirit.

    And so it is that I have a challenge for you peons, you who are so easily swayed by my words whispered in your ears.

    I command you to put on your thinking caps, and come up with some verses to complete a well known song. To he or she who contributes what I, and I alone, decide to be the best line, I 'promise' not to visit you and exert my will over you for a full 12 months.

    So, to start you off:

    On the first day of Mongness, the Emperor said to me "Go on, have just one more pint in the Old Pear Tree"

    TREMBLE IN FEAR OF MY WRATH, FOR I HAVE WROTE

    (edited after my strong Mong-field turned in on itself!)
     
  2. On the second day of christmas etc..................." 2 cans of wobbly"
     
  3. -------------------"--------------------- ...three French Whores...
     
  4. Tytus_Barnowl

    Tytus_Barnowl On ROPs

    Four willing birds
     
  5. Five virgin ring (pieces)!
     
  6. Six sluts-a-swallowing
     
  7. Seven Private Goldens
     
  8. eight maidens miming mmmmmmoooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeee
     
  9. nine naked nympho's
     
  10. 9 Bangkok ladyboys................cough!
     
  11. 10 arrsers asking "aren't there meant to be 12 days of Christmas? has EM been EM'd?"
     
  12. Curses be upon you Artemis, for you shall know my wrath.
    You did remember to order that turkey didn't you?
     
  13. 11 calls to JPAC.
     
  14. She doesn't do turkey, but will accept a quick "goose" if you ask nicely.
     
  15. On the 2nd day of mongness the Emperor sang to me, give me
    Two Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the Old Pear Tree

    On the 3rd day of mongness the Emperor sang to me, give me
    3 Chubbs a hanging, two Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree.

    On the 4th day of mongness the Emperor sang to me, give me 4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, two Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree.

    On the 5th day of mongness the Emperor sang to me,
    Bernoulli killed LNV.....eeee.
    4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, 2 Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree.

    On the 6th day of mongness the Emperor sang to me,
    6 Flash's a banning, Bernoulli killed LNV...... (LNV)
    4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, 2 Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree.

    On the 7th day of mongness the Emperor sang to me,
    7 porno bank drafts, 6 Flash's a banning, Bernie killed LNV....eee..
    4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, 2 Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree........ (there's more)

    On the 8th day of Mongness, the Emperor sang to me,
    8 Biscuits dances Flatley (diddley dee)
    7 porno bank drafts, 6 Flash's a banning, Bernie killed LNV....eee..
    4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, 2 Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree........
    Fcuk me theres more...

    On the 9th day of mongness the emperor sang to me,
    9 naafi threads, 8 Biscuits dancing, 7 porno bank drafts, 6 Flash's a banning, Bernie killed LNV....eee..
    4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, 2 Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree........

    On the 10th day of mongness the emperor sang to me,
    10 Slugs a singing, 9 naafi threads, 8 Biscuits dancing, 7 porno bank drafts, 6 Flash's a banning, Bernie killed LNV....eee..
    4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, 2 Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree........

    On the 11th day of mongness the emperor sang to me,
    11 web site trashings, 10 Slugs a singing, 9 naafi threads, 8 Biscuits dancing, 7 porno bank drafts, 6 Flash's a banning, Bernie killed LNV....eee..
    4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, 2 Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree........

    On the 12th day of mongness the emperor sang to me,
    12% troups a'quitting, 11 web site trashings, 10 Slugs a singing, 9 naafi threads, 8 Biscuits dancing, 7 porno bank drafts, 6 Flash's a banning, Bernie killed LNV....eee..
    4 pints of Aunty, 3 Chubbs a hanging, 2 Gunny's dancing and one more pint in the old pear tree........

    Repeat until flaked out :wink: