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Primrose  Cottage

Primrose Cottage

Paddy O’Farrell
ARRSE Rating
3 Mushroom Heads
I have not come across a book like this in many years; it is a cross between a Whitehall Farce with Brian Rix and one of the books by Tom Sharpe. It is totally irreverent, funny and not in the least bit shy! Plenty of swearing so if that puts you off in books then this may not be for you.

Set in an idyllic English village, very typical and totally unreal in that it has the Church, duck pond, thatched cottages, pub and of course inbred locals! The characters populating this village range from said inbreeds to Russian mafia to a retired Captain who won the MC and does not mind telling people the story (what he does not say is that he was not really brave but pissed out of his mind at the time!) the rather prim and nosey Church Warden cum postmistress who has a transformation during the course of the book and finds her “G” Spot. Added to this are a load of diamonds, Russian spies, CID from London a GP recently arrived from India and a London Solicitor. A hugely varied cast of characters, all totally bonkers!

The beautiful Russian Spy known as the “Black Widow” because her victims usually end up deceased finds herself up against a much more dangerous than usual antagonist in the mis-shape of Captain (Retd) Creighky O’Riley MC. The plot moves from the village to the bedrooms of Moscow hotels and back again. Intrigue drips off every page, though most people don’t even notice it. The village idiot, “Dense” Dimmock is there to add confusion where confusion reigns.

And this all comes about because of a mysterious and very secret committee that meets regularly in Primrose Cottage – what are they discussing? World events or the village drains? Very hush-hush.

This book will not be to everyone’s taste but if you like a good belly laugh at ridiculous events and characters then this is for you. Not to be taken seriously in the slightest but to be read, enjoyed, chuckled at and wonder about the sanity of the author!

3 out of 5 Mr Mushroomheads.

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