Military Cliches

• The blue ribbon donates a water feature on the model
• Pacifically I mean that..........
• Can't means won't - won't means jail
• Rip yer arm away like you're ripping Michael Jackson off your son
• You are in your own time now
• You are shaggin idle
• This isn't an attendance only course
• I've spent longer in NAAFI queues
• I was in Baghdad when you were swilling round in your dads bag
• I could make more noise slapping my cock off the urinal.
• That fcuking bedblock looks like an elephants nest
• These balls are Gristle not crystal
• Today its buttons, tomorrow its ammo pouches, the day after its submarine hatches
• My tea is a salad and my wife is ugly
• The ball is in your court
• You write your own report
• I'm going to shove this pace stick through your ears and ride you round the square like a motorbike!
• I'm gonna rip your arm off and beat you to death with the soggy end!
• Admin - it's not a small town in China!
• If its not Raining its not Training!
• If its not snowing, we're not going!
• Strike, seize and grasp the rifle in a Y like grip - If you break it you can have the afternoon off and I'll buy you another
• I couldnt give a fcuk about your problems, I do warfare not welfare.
• If you have an issue, grab a tissue.
• Did you iron that with a pillow/cold iron/cold mess tin.
• What did you iron that with? A hot rock?
• What did you iron that with? A Fcuking Thunderflash?
• Slick drills, Easy kills.
• Move the rifle around your head, NOT your head around the rifle
• In a smart, uniform AND soldier-like fashion.
• Dig the heels in - MORE YET!
• Your other left
• Move... with the speed of a thousand gazelles
• You...get in a bucket of sand and sing the desert song.
• Open your legs - your mum did!
• I was on the main gate when you were on Cow & Gate.
• Don't get a sad on, get a mag on, and get a stag on.
• Drill is like a man. It always comes.
• Stand still when you're moving!
• Get some time in.
• You have had more sleep than the unknown soldier
• There are three type of sarge- sausage, massage and back passage
• Get a move on laddie or I'll stick my dick in your ear and make you look like a petrol pump!
• When I want your fcuking opinion I'll give it to you.
• I've rolled the rover over, over.
• Spread out, in a bunch.
• Screw the Bobbin
• Whose coat is this jacket?
• Youve had more time off than John Waynes Safety Catch!
• Look in, listen in!
• Admin by thunderflash.