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From ARRSEpedia

Women come in 2 sorts:

• Porn Stars
• Hippocrocagrillapigs

It is possible for them to magically transform into the other under certain conditions:

• Hippocrocagrillapig to Porn Star: beer goggles
• Porn Star to Hippocrocagrillapig: marriage

The Fairer sex. Don't know why they are called that - they can be bloody unfair! Often the source of male confusion because of her mixed signals and illogic. Any man who can actually work out what they want is either missing a Chromosome OR is a bleeding mind reader. A person with whom a man can be emotional without being accused of being a homo. Often cause men to spend large sums of money. Can be the source of exteme emotional pain and hopelessness. The odd one decides to join the Forces, and is invariably assumed to be a lesbian by those bright sparks we call the general public. This is of course a completely baseless assumption, as even if they are from 56 Signal Squadron there is still a good chance they are just a window licker.

Also see woman