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Semi-retired goat blower. Number 1 in the British Underwater Tiddlywinks team. If Girls Aloud had flat heads, vestigial limbs, and Mlaaared a lot... MDN would be in heaven - he loves the gwa one the most! Enjoys tormenting Dullards and ARRSE-Maidens.

Has a unsettling anal fixation especially with the Yanks. Especially infatuated with Cait who is so MDN-like it's scary. Also keen on schoolgirls and Mongs. MDN's well-known porn addiction came to an abrupt end when Blondebint began emailing him home-produced 'spread' shots of herself, which looked disturbingly like a mad axeman had gone berserk in a gorilla shop. After several cold showers and a weekend retreat at a Buddhist monastery in Cumbria, MDN swore off porn for life, even consigning his unique collection of celebrity bukkake DVDs to the dustbin.

Actually Welsh born, though neither MDN nor the Welsh are keen to admit this, though he did have something to do wth the AAC at some point.

Perhaps his most attractive characteristic is his capacity for forgiveness and tolerance. Concerned at the raw deal given to paedophiles and other sex-pests after they've paid their debt to society, MDN has thrown his home open to them to act as a half-way house, giving them the opportunity to drop out of sight for a while, regroup and adopt a disguise before resuming their predatory careers. All MDN asks in return is half of their weekly benefit cheque and any spare polaroids they happen to have left over.

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