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Its still unclear if Sergey is indeed a mathematician as he claims or if he is some sort of rogue KGB agent gathering intelligence on the British Army. Either way, his particular grasp of English is much appreciated and often highly entertaining. All quotes are to be read in your best "No Mr.Bond, I expect you to die! Muhahahaha" accent.

Theorizing on why Rebekah Wade (editor of The Sun) would allegedly assault her husband Ross Kemp (aka hard man Sgt.Henno Garvey in Ultimate Force):

"... he showed two tomatos, so lovely, so mmm... then huge cucumber, fantastic, huge, delicious... my mouth, my lips are... but ... white liquid! I hate it taste ... idiot ... how many times I should repeat? I like salad with olive oil, not with mayonnaise!!!"

On Basra Council's demand that British soldiers be handed over for interogation:

"If it is not stupid demand then call me a balerine. "

Sergey on the lack of armoured cars for soldiers despite Cherie Blair having an armoured limosine:

"As we were told situation in Iraq goes better, so armoured cars are too expensive from point of view of MoDs planners.

As to beutifull, adorable wife the Great leader then her safety is no doubt a subject of serious concern of British people."

On the similarities between Blair and Putin:

"A fisherman see a fisherman from a long distance. In Russian: Rybak rybaka vidit izdaleka. I think you understand meaning of this Russian (probably not only Russian) saying."

Haven't the foggiest idea what he's talking about here:

"But Russia is Russia and it is not France or Great Britain. I mean one simple thing: few drops of wine don't turn barrel of water into wine."

On the feasibility of Turkey joining the EU:

"It is like a married man promisses a lass to marry. He knows that at least technically is it impossible until he become widower."

On Blair staying in power:

"Once The Bear asked the Monkey: when will we return Rats and Hawks from the Desert to our Forest?

- Then their Job will be done.

- Rather I will become a White Bear.

- So you know the right answer.

- Recently we defeated flying pigs and I wish to run the Forest. When will it happen?

- Then my Job will be done.

- ???

- So you know the right answer. "

On Russian sayings:

Bear's service - something quite opposite to desired objectives. Highly esteemed mr.Bush is likely the main supplier of this type of services to American people.

A bear has steped on smb's ear - absolutely untuneful ear.

A hunter to another one: I catched a bear. - bring 'im here! - I try but he resists!

Finally, just to prove he thinks like a mathematician:

"I never vote on ARRSE's polls even on ones initiated by me because it is a British military forum and results of polls should reflect opinions of Soldiers.

Axiom A: each country with anti-American policy is heading toward a dictatorship.

Theorem 1: Venezuela is heading towards a dictatorship."

Frequently I enjoy by highly informative discussions with individuals those intellect is probably higher than my one and I feel myself very comfortably