How Do I Lace My Boots Up, Corporal

Speaking as a Recruit Instructor, I'm bemused by the number of ways in which people lace up their boots. With five minutes spent getting it right, the issue boots can magically transform into something actually quite comfortable.

So, a few photos ( due to lowest common denominator = Thick SUTs... ) since Booties and the Maroon Machine don't read so good.

Step One - Equipment

Remove the laces and GIVE YOUR BOOTS A GOOD CLEAN YOU 'ORRIBLE LITTLE MAN!

Step Two - Stick What Where?

Ensure that the laces are threaded through the lowest holes - over or under, does not really matter - but make sure the loose ends are of equal length...

Step Three - Knit One Purl One

Start to lace upwards; note that the laces cross over and are *pulled* through the eyelet, not pushed.

Step Four - Getting Comfy

Same again - but do not lace past the odd little metal bit, yet...

Step Five - Bit Like Knobbing

Thread the laces through the odd little metal bit...DON'T miss it out..

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Step Six - Do It Again

Carry On Lacing - cross over style, again, to the top...

Step Seven - Knotty Problem

A neat little over and under:

Step Eight - Almost Done

Loop laces around the upper boot, with a bow at the front. NOTE that this is the point where you find out if you've bothered to get both ends of the lace to be equal length, per step two...

ALSO make sure that you DO NOT tie them too tight, this could lead to more pain and general bad stuff. If they feel too tight, or if you are aware of them, time to loosen...

Step Nine - Take A Bow

Tidy the bow into the tops of your boots - the leather is cut away to take the bow...

Step Ten - Well Done

Make sure that the laces below the indicated point are relatively snug, and the laces above the indicated point are looser. Doing this will a) stop the lower foot from moving within the boot, which can lead to blisters, and b)help prevent shin splints ( = ouch ) by letting your lower leg flex.