Fart

FIRE IN THE HOLE!

A 'Fart' is an English language (British) vulgarism most commonly used in reference to flatulence. (or so says the wiki definition)

A build up of methane gas in the intestines. This needs to vent somewhere of the owner of the wind will explode. This wind escapes through the anus however as the anus is spring loaded, only a small amount of gas can escape at a time. This causes a high speed futfutfutfut noise which is beloved by the squaddie who worships this gas venting and named it a 'fart'.

The fart is best appreciated when loud and with the odour of rancid eggs

OR

silent and with the odour of rancid eggs (aka SBD - Silent but Deadly).

The worshipping of farts can be done in many ways ...

• Farting in a confined space currently being shared by one or more other squaddies ie the back of a wagon.
• Farting around someone's face ... extra kudos can be scored if he/she is currently rendering Oral Sex at the moment of fart.
• Loudly farting (and remaining unidentified) during large briefings with senior officers/ministers. If identified expect an Interview Without Coffee.
• Setting said fart alight (see picture) ... with extra credit for rendering 2nd degree burns of the anus to oneself. Explaining this to the MO is trickier but no less amusing ... for the farters mates!

Note: Never hold your farts in. They travel up your spine, into your brain, and that's where you get shitty ideas from.

Holding your farts in is known as Traffing.

Find out more in the Dictionary