ARmy Rumour SErvice

**DeeJay** · 24-07-2007, 21:22

4 Bde HQ in Macedonia on Agricola 1.

Moving the HQ complex two feet to the right cos the entrance wasn't quite in line with the entrance to the cookhouse and it was confusing the staff.

Same tour, same location. Finishing a twelve hour shift and getting handed a bit of broken pallet to scrape the mud off paths through the wood as the staff didn't like getting their boots muddy.

**PoisonDwarf** · 25-07-2007, 12:29

Saw a classic about 18 months ago on Ex Nordic Shield. JTFHQ was set up on an usused field. It was unused because of its tendency to flood all the time. As soon as the tents were up, the rains started. A few days later it was carnage. The guys from Two Five Great were digging trench systems all round the HQ trying to drain the water away. The ICC was flooded and the JOCS servers was up on pallets trying to keep them out of the water. Every now and again a tent moved so they could drain the water. In the end, they dismantled the lot and re-set up in a building. Remember this is Norway during the winter, mud and snow everywhere. Cue wailing and gnashing of teeth. Morale was decidedly low, although there was definitely a 'work hard play hard' ethic going on in the evenings! Poor bastards worked their arses off. Not that the staff noticed.

**pooteruser** · 25-07-2007, 19:00

Originally Posted by CHARLIE224

Moving 1 Div HQ, 1 foot to the right during an FTX so that the GOC did'nt have to step over it on the way in and out the complex. Only good thing about the Ex was the CO gave the OC 212 a screwdriver and told him to pack his sh#t up and standby for posting. OC 212 was a right gay bar pest, hope his dead with AIDS.

What a day that was. Seeing the bloke almost in tears didnt even make up for the f$&k about, all for a little wall too close to Div Main entrance.

Dont miss doing the Div thing at all ! ! !

**parasigs** · 25-07-2007, 23:50

I remember the most bone job I ever did very well. Lasted about nine years!!!! :D

**gimli1001** · 26-07-2007, 07:22

the worst one
our squadron got jiffed to pick up leaves around the camp on bradbury bks, only to be told, we had to put them back as it didnt look natural so we were walking round emptying binbags full of leaves onto the ground,

what fun

**exbleep** · 27-07-2007, 17:51

Originally Posted by gimli1001

the worst one
our squadron got jiffed to pick up leaves around the camp on bradbury bks, only to be told, we had to put them back as it didnt look natural so we were walking round emptying binbags full of leaves onto the ground,

what fun

Don't really think that'll be beaten for "Take the men out and F*ck them around, Sarn't Major". Good one.

I do remember working in the QMs stencilling names on MFO boxes for 3 months in between postings which was really using my expertise as I'd just finished a 9 month course which must have cost the taxpayer a bundle. Fabulous use of resources.

**char-wahlah** · 27-07-2007, 18:11

Cleaning the shiny red tiled floors at ATR Pirbright with a toothbrush at 4 in the morning! Ahh what fabulous memories!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Join the army and clean the world

**Sig_E** · 10-08-2007, 21:45

Originally Posted by PoisonDwarf

Saw a classic about 18 months ago on Ex Nordic Shield. JTFHQ was set up on an usused field. It was unused because of its tendency to flood all the time. As soon as the tents were up, the rains started. A few days later it was carnage. The guys from Two Five Great were digging trench systems all round the HQ trying to drain the water away. The ICC was flooded and the JOCS servers was up on pallets trying to keep them out of the water. Every now and again a tent moved so they could drain the water. In the end, they dismantled the lot and re-set up in a building. Remember this is Norway during the winter, mud and snow everywhere. Cue wailing and gnashing of teeth. Morale was decidedly low, although there was definitely a 'work hard play hard' ethic going on in the evenings! Poor bastards worked their arses off. Not that the staff noticed.

I was there too,I felt so sorry for them all! Still,it didnt break them. It just meant there drinking hours changed slightly. I dont think they actually slept!

**heidtheba** · 10-08-2007, 21:54

Originally Posted by gimli1001

the worst one
our squadron got jiffed to pick up leaves around the camp on bradbury bks, only to be told, we had to put them back as it didnt look natural so we were walking round emptying binbags full of leaves onto the ground,

what fun

When was that Gimli?

**still21inmymind** · 10-08-2007, 22:30

Bone Jobs I Have Known:
1. POL point 'boss/orderly/d1ck' at Blandford.

2. RP staff at Bunde. Used do 3-way shift; week of days, week of nights, week off. On my week off I used to get sent on exercise for a week. Cnuts.

3. Kohima fest, Bunde again, just an excuse to d1ck around an entire regiment of already p1ssed off men (very few women in them days).

4. Setting up the Offrs Mess tent at 8FdForSigSqn Tidworth; tablecloths, silver, the full monty. This was on exercise mind.

5. AMF(L) Sig Sqn, Norway, Turkey et al. Roof Racks On, Roof Racks Off. Used to drive from Blandford to Marchwood in low ratio to try and blow something on the lannies so we could swerve the exercise.

6. Bunde again, the Silver Jubilee and anything connected with it.

7. Aldershot, post Falklands, trying to explain to a dipsh1t QM why I could not produce the two genes (which he was ready to bill me for) that had been sent out to us. On the Atlantic Conveyor. And the same cnut telling me to bill guys for kit lost during the op, which to my eternal pride I never did.