Hi everyone,
I have a query about my new relationship, but I don't want to ask friends and family for reasons that will be apparent, so a bit of anonymous advice would be appreciated.

Right, I just got a new girlfriend and I'm very fond of her indeed. She really is lovely and she seems pretty keen on me too. It would appear that she has been out with some right slime-balls previously (she is alarmingly pretty, and pretty girls always seem to attract tossers) and has been cheated on several times. I think she has some self-esteem issues, perhaps partly as result of this, but nothing dramatic, and I am resolved to be a grown up and generally nice to her (by way of a change).

Anyway, she told me that she once cheated on a previous boyfriend. I have never cheated on anyone, and while I don't want to be self-righteous and judgmental, I am really not interested in playing that kind of game. She 'fessed up to this pretty early (we've only been going out officially for a few days), wanting to turn over a new leaf I suppose.

So my question is, should I take a chance, bearing in mind that I really like her, and want a serious relationship? Alternatively, should I get out before I get too emotionally attached? I'm really not interested in a girlfriend who cheats on me, but at the same time I'm not going to get all paranoid. I'd really appreciate some dispassionate advice. Can you ever be trusted after cheating once?

Yeah. Go for it. If it works, great. If it don't, then it don't.

Cheating is alarmingly common. ie it happens alot ...not just to people who dont tawk proper like.
Does sound like you'll need to stop thinking about it at some point and accept what is going on. Be good to her, dont smother her and act paranoid. Let go and see what happens. Spend the time you would have spent on worrying on something more useful and productive instead ie something in your own life or plans for the two of you. Keep a clean mind and you may keep a clean r'ship. Remember most women want someone to make them laugh, be suppportive but not smothering (keep her wanting to have you so dont be too easy) and strong. Their minds can be all over the place at times so set your path straight, stick to it and be strong.

Hope it goes well. Have fun.

Just do her up the tradesmans anyway, solves all sorts of problems that does.


Next................

Fúck her but never trust her.

Originally Posted by long_tall_frenchie

Hi everyone,
I have a query about my new relationship, but I don't want to ask friends and family for reasons that will be apparent, so a bit of anonymous advice would be appreciated.

Right, I just got a new girlfriend and I'm very fond of her indeed. She really is lovely and she seems pretty keen on me too. It would appear that she has been out with some right slime-balls previously (she is alarmingly pretty, and pretty girls always seem to attract tossers) and has been cheated on several times. I think she has some self-esteem issues, perhaps partly as result of this, but nothing dramatic, and I am resolved to be a grown up and generally nice to her (by way of a change).

Anyway, she told me that she once cheated on a previous boyfriend. I have never cheated on anyone, and while I don't want to be self-righteous and judgmental, I am really not interested in playing that kind of game. She 'fessed up to this pretty early (we've only been going out officially for a few days), wanting to turn over a new leaf I suppose.

So my question is, should I take a chance, bearing in mind that I really like her, and want a serious relationship? Alternatively, should I get out before I get too emotionally attached? I'm really not interested in a girlfriend who cheats on me, but at the same time I'm not going to get all paranoid. I'd really appreciate some dispassionate advice. Can you ever be trusted after cheating once?

Why don't you bang some hoors until you've decided?

In my experience women unlike real human beings are lying, cheating scheming individuals who are only good for one thing & they can't do that properly on their own.

But for a more critical opinion we would need to see the undraped photo's.

My two pence worth?

Why did she cheat? Drunken mistake, looking for an 'out'?

If someone has never cheated, it does mean they won't. Relax, life is one big risk! But ease off the 'serious relationship' stuff - you say it's been a matter of days? Take it as it comes, for want of a better phrase

Its simple. Her dad was a bastard and her boyfriends were bastards. She really likes bastards. Treat her like shit, shag around and fuck her off after a couple of months. Its what she wants in a man.

Steps one to five of a straight forward plan to manage this thorny little problem.

1) Start by being a perfect gentleman - generous, charming, loving, if just an eensy bit over-protective.

2) Start suggesting she dress a little more conservatively - you are only looking out for her best interests, after all. Reduce temptation and therefore danger.

3) Reinforce suggestions with the odd steely glare - begin hints that she should see less of her friends - keep a lovingly close eye on her.

4) Weave in the odd slap and spank to reinforce how much this plan is for her benefit.

5) Accidentally kill girlfriend while instilling some more robust reinforcement. Bury at the bottom of the garden. Positively no chance of any cheating by this point.

You're very welcome.

LB