- 02-06-2012, 20:36 #1331
- Join Date
- May 2012
Not the SWMBO, the daughter, earlier today.
"So when the Queen dies, Charles will get coronated then?"
She's at university. We're all doomed.In my 50's and thus a grumpy old man. Just so long as you realise that I'm right and you're wrong, we'll get along just fine, OK?
- 08-06-2012, 20:24 #1332
TSO's only on her third glass of Merlot... however on watching "Come Dine With Me" where one of the cooks gave her cat chicken trimmings out came "Do cats really eat raw meat?"... "No, darling. They've been cooking since time immemorial." Cue silence, killer looks and huffiness from her.- Si dubitas, fuge.
- 08-06-2012, 20:29 #1333
- 08-06-2012, 20:46 #1334
...some of many but this is the latest couple.
Feck wittery No1
Saw her pour fairy liquid into the hand wash dispenser by the kitchen sink.
Me: Er, whatcha doing?
Her: It's so the handwash won't run out so quick'
Me: So the washing up liquid does instead?
Her: Blank look.....
Feck wittery No2.
Russia v Czech Rep
Her: That's the Chelski goalie
Her: Ooh look there's Frank Lampard.
- 09-06-2012, 03:49 #1335
yeah your missus is a twatJeremy clarkson on cyclist's:
Trespassers in the motorcars domain, they do not pay road tax and therefore have no right to be on the road, some of them even believe they are going fast enough to not be an obstruction. Run them down to prove them wrong
- 09-06-2012, 22:09 #1336
Please, please help me… Despite TSO holding forth last night on Israel and its nuclear capability (see the thread for some genuine analytical thought from her) she has just come out with a stunner…
Picture the scene: A warmish mid-Summer evening. All is quiet in the close. It’s half time between The Hun and the Portugease in some God forsaken former part of the evil Soviet empire. TSO departs to make a brew whilst ND sneaks out for a smoke with the neighbour.
TSO (for it is She): “I say, time has flown. They’ve just had half-time and the clock shows they’ve played 87 minutes…"
ND: “That’s because you spent ages in the kitchen my rabid dog.”
TSO: “Can’t be! Or has it to do with the time difference in Ukraine?”
Please will someone explain the appearance of a time v. space continuum warp in Surrey that just appeared or is she just plain barking? I have noticed on the “How Bone..” post how many of us have partners with BAs, Doctorates and, clearly, brilliant minds, but why can’t time be part of the equation or a simple understanding of the off-side rule be beyond them?
Last edited by Negligent-Discharge; 09-06-2012 at 22:10. Reason: Mongness in the fingers- Si dubitas, fuge.
- 10-06-2012, 16:57 #1337
Watching rugby with a mate and his mrs last year, she piped up and said;
"Those shirts aren't very good, the blue from the O2 logo is running right down the side"
Had nothing to do with the fucking great blue RBS logo painted on the pitchDon't pray for an easy life. Pray to be a stronger man - JFK
- 10-06-2012, 18:31 #1338
If anyone remembers the Giles cartoons ca 1966 and the Gran, well that's TSO watching the Euro footie. Apparently, the Eyetie who scored was castrated the last time he played and missed an open goal. She's not dangerous yet as she's only on the third glass of Merlot, so I pointed out that she meant "castigated".... and silence reigned... and no chance of some "dessert" for me tonight.- Si dubitas, fuge.
- 10-06-2012, 18:39 #1339
- Join Date
- Oct 2003
- The Isle of Innisfree
- 10-06-2012, 18:50 #1340