Is he gay, or secure in his sexuality?

**theoriginalphantom** · 05-10-2008, 17:51

Dear arrsers,
I would like, if I may, to take you on a strange journey...

Imagine, if you will, that you are a young man who has arrived at a party which is in full swing. You have been greeted by men, women and dogs all in varying stages of inebriation. One of the men kisses you. (now to my mind this should have set alarm bells ringing. very large, very loud alarm bells)
As the evening progresses and more alcohol is consumed you are given several choices of sleeping arrangement.

Option 1. sleep in the hostesses bed (older of the two ladies present)
Option 2 sleep in a bed with the younger woman (who has a small waxed moustache)
Option 3. Sleep on the floor
Option 4. Sleep in the bed containing a gay man of the homosexual persuasion.

No names, no pack drill.

Now our 'theoretical hero' went for option 4. what does that make him?

**stacker1** · 05-10-2008, 17:52

Originally Posted by theoriginalphantom

what does that make him?

RAF?

**kes1** · 05-10-2008, 17:55

Navy surely?

**The_Phantom** · 05-10-2008, 17:56

A cast iron hetro can sleep in the bloke's bed confident that he is not going to be lying awake all night thinking ...i wonder what gay love is like. He will just get his fat nut down.

**scarletto** · 05-10-2008, 17:57

Originally Posted by theoriginalphantom

Dear arrsers,
I would like, if I may, to take you on a strange journey...

Imagine, if you will, that you are a young man who has arrived at a party which is in full swing. You have been greeted by men, women and dogs all in varying stages of inebriation. One of the men kisses you. (now to my mind this should have set alarm bells ringing. very large, very loud alarm bells)
As the evening progresses and more alcohol is consumed you are given several choices of sleeping arrangement.

Option 1. sleep in the hostesses bed (older of the two ladies present)
Option 2 sleep in a bed with the younger woman (who has a small waxed moustache)
Option 3. Sleep on the floor
Option 4. Sleep in the bed containing a gay man of the homosexual persuasion.

No names, no pack drill.

Now our 'theoretical hero' went for option 4. what does that make him?

MDN???

**Airfix** · 05-10-2008, 17:57

Originally Posted by stacker1

Originally Posted by theoriginalphantom

what does that make him?

RAF?

New Secretary of State for businees?

**theoriginalphantom** · 05-10-2008, 17:57

Originally Posted by The_Phantom

A cast iron hetro can sleep in the bloke's bed confident that he is not going to be lying awake all night thinking ...i wonder what gay love is like. He will just get his fat nut down.

In that case, why did he leave with spunk in his socks the following morning?

**Gren** · 05-10-2008, 17:59

fookin stupid?

**insert-coin-here** · 05-10-2008, 18:00

By the sounds of it he went for the best looking and most hygenic shag on offer.

However he made the mistake of breaking the first rule of manclub.

'Its only gay if your oppo's find out'.

So for having such shit persec he is obviously a pink hot pants wearing,puddle dodging,cock gobbling,poo pusher.

**Airfix** · 05-10-2008, 18:01

Originally Posted by insert-coin-here

So for having such shit persec he is obviously a pink hot pants wearing,puddle dodging,cock gobbling,poo pusher.

Or the new Secretary of State for Business....

**IndianaDel** · 05-10-2008, 18:02

Originally Posted by theoriginalphantom

Dear arrsers,
I would like, if I may, to take you on a strange journey...

Imagine, if you will, that you are a young man who has arrived at a party which is in full swing. You have been greeted by men, women and dogs all in varying stages of inebriation. One of the men kisses you. (now to my mind this should have set alarm bells ringing. very large, very loud alarm bells)
As the evening progresses and more alcohol is consumed you are given several choices of sleeping arrangement.

Option 1. sleep in the hostesses bed (older of the two ladies present)
Option 2 sleep in a bed with the younger woman (who has a small waxed moustache)
Option 3. Sleep on the floor
Option 4. Sleep in the bed containing a gay man of the homosexual persuasion.

No names, no pack drill.

Now our 'theoretical hero' went for option 4. what does that make him?

A benighted sod, who is having seven streaks of Pish ripped out of him for a VERY poor selection?

**thegimp** · 05-10-2008, 18:03

Wait a minute, he got his fat one down early which was a bit gay, but didnt join any herma in bed,

Avoiding the clutches of slug would surely turn anyone homo

So no fag call but should have put a chair under the door handle

**The_Phantom** · 05-10-2008, 18:03

originalphantom

I guess he is an utter bender then but by that token, your thread should have been entitled...This bloke I know is an utter bender - let's all point at him, call him names and throw stuff at him. No need for a vote.

**theoriginalphantom** · 05-10-2008, 18:06

Originally Posted by The_Phantom

originalphantom

I guess he is an utter bender then but by that token, your thread should have been entitled...This bloke I know is an utter bender - let's all point at him, call him names and throw stuff at him. No need for a vote.

no this way he has a chance of being voted as 'hetro tiger'

OK no he doesn't really stand a chance, but it looks like he has a chance.
Obviously the manly option would have been to stay awake all night, or sleep in the garden.

**The_Snail** · 05-10-2008, 18:13

Originally Posted by theoriginalphantom

Originally Posted by The_Phantom

originalphantom

I guess he is an utter bender then but by that token, your thread should have been entitled...This bloke I know is an utter bender - let's all point at him, call him names and throw stuff at him. No need for a vote.

no this way he has a chance of being voted as 'hetro tiger'

OK no he doesn't really stand a chance, but it looks like he has a chance.
Obviously the manly option would have been to stay awake all night, or sleep in the garden.

Ahem, under the gazebo he put up. Wouldn't have just let him sleep in the garden - I'm not that mean.