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  1. 30-11-2007, 22:45 #1
    Biscuits_AB
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    Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    Today, my youngest came home from school all chuffed to NAAFI breaks that she'd been given a part in the school nativity play. Marvellous I thought. Standing there are happy and smiley, she thrust out the written confirmation she held in her tiny little hand.

    It read;

    Dear Parent,

    CHRISTMAS NATIVITY

    Your child ????? has been chosen to play the part of a bat. Please can you arrange for your child to wear a suitable costume.

    Yours sincerely

    ?? ?????
    KS1 Teacher

    A f*cking bat? For the life of me and I'm a taig, I sure as f*ck don't recall any bats in the nativity?
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  2. 30-11-2007, 22:52 #2
    Sixty
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    Quote Originally Posted by Biscuits_AB

    A f*cking bat? For the life of me and I'm a taig, I sure as f*ck don't recall any bats in the nativity?
    It's for the three wise men. They got the gold and myrrh all right but couldn't find any Frankenstein so they went with Dracula.
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  3. 30-11-2007, 22:54 #3
    theoriginalphantom
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    is your kid Black?
    also available in sarcastic



    Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.

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  4. 30-11-2007, 22:54 #4
    Poppy
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Party-Fancy-Dr...QQcmdZViewItem

    http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/Girls-Black-an...QQcmdZViewItem
    there you go.............
    Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways,camel blue in one hand,wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming WOW!!! WHAT A RIDE !!!!!!!!!!!
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  5. 30-11-2007, 22:55 #5
    BiscuitsAB
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    Quote Originally Posted by Biscuits_AB
    Today, my youngest came home from school all chuffed to NAAFI breaks that she'd been given a part in the school nativity play. Marvellous I thought. Standing there are happy and smiley, she thrust out the written confirmation she held in her tiny little hand.

    It read;

    Dear Parent,

    CHRISTMAS NATIVITY

    Your child ????? has been chosen to play the part of a bat. Please can you arrange for your child to wear a suitable costume.

    Yours sincerely

    ?? ?????
    KS1 Teacher

    A f*cking bat? For the life of me and I'm a taig, I sure as f*ck don't recall any bats in the nativity?

    Well tell the teacher you think its ok for your daughter to play a bat as long as it can be called Mohammed.
    “The truth is incontrovertible, malice may attack it, ignorance may deride it, but in the end; there it is.” - Winston Churchill.

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  6. 30-11-2007, 22:58 #6
    DozyBint
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    The teacher was obviously inspired by Love Actually:

    Karen: So what's this big news, then?
    Daisy: [excited] We've been given our parts in the nativity play. And I'm the lobster.
    Karen: The lobster?
    Daisy: Yeah!
    Karen: In the nativity play?
    Daisy: [beaming] Yeah, *first* lobster.
    Karen: There was more than one lobster present at the birth of Jesus?
    Daisy: Duh.

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  7. 30-11-2007, 23:05 #7
    pomps
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    Pomps MK I & II have school play with a difference, apparently traditional nativity is not the done thing these days FFS.
    So, like Mr AB, small notes of paper informing MKI is playing part of 2nd Alien and MKII is playing part of a Robot. Suitable costumes procured from the web.

    Theme seems to be one of Merry Red Dwarf/StarTreck instead of Merry Christmas.
    FOR SALE: 1 set of morals, never used, will sell cheap!
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  8. 01-12-2007, 00:11 #8
    LIMA
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    I want to play Mohammed the Holy Bear!!!
    Fall in, Fall out, get drunk and Fall about!
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  9. 01-12-2007, 00:26 #9
    jibman
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    a bat!!!mine,s a fcuking snowflake!
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  10. 01-12-2007, 00:32 #10
    skintboymike
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    I want to be Abu 'Captain Hook' Hamza, the resident baddie.

    I know it's a nativity, but all plays have a baddie. It's the law.
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  11. 01-12-2007, 00:37 #11
    Airfix
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    Here's how to handle it - get a good picie of Blair, make a cardboard face out of it with elastic and send sprog off with it to the play.

    When teacher complains of Blair mask not bat reply, oh my, that's the dyslexia, I thought your letter said 'play the part of a tw@t'!

    :D
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  12. 01-12-2007, 00:37 #12
    jibman
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    i want to be comical ali the resident joker.
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  13. 01-12-2007, 00:38 #13
    Dwarf
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    Might it not be a cricket bat?
    Adjudged to be a 'Civilized Pervert' by my Arrse peers.

    I bow to their wisdom

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  14. 01-12-2007, 00:39 #14
    Flagrantviolator
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    Quote Originally Posted by LIMA
    I want to play Mohammed the Holy Bear!!!
    Erm, Muhammad is thethe Donkey, I thought. Inclusiveness and all...
    Some third-wave feminists prefer not to call themselves feminists, as the word feminist can be misinterpreted as insensitive to the fluid notion of gender and the potential oppressions inherent in all gender roles, or perhaps misconstrued as exclusive or elitist by critics. Others have kept and redefined the term to include these ideas. Third-wave feminism seeks to challenge any universal definition of femininity.
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  15. 01-12-2007, 12:04 #15
    spike7451
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    Re: Christmas Nativity Play Characters

    The 3 wise men, saddam,uday & ali with guest appearances by tony Blair & george bush as the ass (donkey) & fay 'tugboat' turney as the virgin mary.
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