Useful

**Mighty_doh_nut** · 03-07-2008, 15:21

Originally Posted by Praetorian

Yeah, my signed 1st ed is crumbling as well, but to be fair I seem to remember there being a fuck up on the manufacturers part involving a hot summer and the wrong sort of glue to bind it.

Thats because the pair of Pikeys used Rat pack bogroll and range glue to knock em together.

I've just bought 5...... It would be rude not to kit the Spanish apartments out with them :D

**convoy_cock** · 03-07-2008, 17:43

Originally Posted by minister_doh_nut

Originally Posted by Praetorian

Yeah, my signed 1st ed is crumbling as well, but to be fair I seem to remember there being a fuck up on the manufacturers part involving a hot summer and the wrong sort of glue to bind it.

Thats because the pair of Pikeys used Rat pack bogroll and range glue to knock em together.

I've just bought 5...... It would be rude not to kit the Spanish apartments out with them :D

We was ripped off so we woz, sorrrrr!!

To be specific though, it wasn't rat pack bog roll, it was finest bog rolls accrued from single soldiers accommodation by the elite unit known only as '1st Battalion the Beanstealing Pad Bast-ards'

Oh, and it wasn't range glue either. Me and Rigsby have both had the snip. Unfortunately, it reduced the adhesive qualities of our sp-unk. When we replaced the copies we employed Peter North. This meant that the pages stayed in but the banding machine looked like a plasterers radio.

**crabby** · 06-07-2008, 16:37

I'm being a mong; is there a difference between the first edition (some of my pages have fallen out, but it is much loved) and the new one with the snazzy cover? The excerpts etc seem the same... Is this the long awaited 2nd book?

Yours

Pointy-headed fcukwit

**the_rigger** · 09-07-2008, 08:44

Well, Mr C.
It's basically a re-issue with several changes. There's been some 'tweaking', a few more 80s references. The big differences are Belize is going to book 2, but on a bonus side, there is an extensive (and hopefully amusing) glossary and some funny forwards.
I hope that answers any questions. We were going to have 'author photographs' of me and Convoy 'splaying' but we figured it may cross from the comedy in to the horror genre and simultaneously confuse and traumatise the reader.

**Ozgerbobble** · 09-07-2008, 15:44

A Convoy and Rigger double prostate shot as a kind of homage to Senor Goatse. Very touching.

Look forward to reading the update. has the amended version been edited to allow space for tales of crate lifting, jousting or pishing over 4 tonners?

**convoy_cock** · 09-07-2008, 19:36

I favoured the one of me looking over my shoulder coquettishly dressed like him wot won the Turner prize.

Funnily enough, we were in a pub near Nuneaton today, doing an interview with Soldier magazine about the book. They've been great and have really took an interest. There should be something in either next month or the month after's edition. They took our picture at the end. The photographer Steve, was a good bloke and obviously ex-military. He snapped away for quarter of an hour, getting us do various things with the book, none of which rendered the copy unsellable I might add. I'm pretty certain we'll look like grinning knobs though, unless they've got a copy of a new copy of Uber-Photoshop

We had a good laugh doing the glossary, I like the one for 'Army Apprentice College' which reads 'Junior army training and education facility, where soldiers learn vital skills such as weapon handling, drill and wanking undetected in an eight-man room'

**Biggles4221** · 10-07-2008, 20:42

Have to ask chaps. Is there an ETA on the next book?
I've read the first one about 4 times now and passed it to my parents (Both Crabs, loved it) and l'm in dying need of another good book!!

**Brush_Dust_Shake** · 11-07-2008, 05:13

Convoy & Rigger,
I read Picking Up The Brass in a oner yesterday whilst at work (yes, it was quiet) & found it so funny it hurt! I was reduced to almost pishing myself by how Skiddy got his name (I remember a similar incident which involved the hapless gungey git having to wear his rolled-down kitbag containing similar items on his head for 8 hours), the guy who could stretch his bag over a pint pot (knew one like him too) & the Saturday Morning Sniper (saw a similar incident at HorseGuards with an RHA Gunner, who shot builders up the arrse).
Several work colleagues of my OH have expressed interest in reading it (they're intrigued by the Creative use of swearing) so it's going to do the rounds there too. Superb book, congratulations! Can't wait to read The Map of Africa.......
Cheers for a really good laugh,
B_D_S :D

**jack-daniels** · 11-07-2008, 07:50

CC, with regards to the title of your new epic 'The Map of Africa', one of the posters on here served with us and that boy could lash the map of Africa down his jeans at will! I'm sure he'll oblige should you need a photo!!

**convoy_cock** · 11-07-2008, 11:58

Brush Dust Snake - Really glad you enjoyed it. Don't lend it out though mate. I'd hate for you to lose it if one of your pals forgot to return it. I find that the safest thing to do in these situations is get them all to buy their own copy. My comment is not motivated by the desire for more sales, just your literary well being.

JD - That wouldn't be a poster with the same initials as your posting name would it? If it's him, there has been no finer swamper of his and other peoples beds, in the history of the Corps. I did a Jocommex with him on HMS York and they stuck him on the top bunk (of a three high tier) He soaked himself and both matelots, the lad on the bottom getting pure uric acid due to the filtration from the upper two mattresses.