ARmy Rumour SErvice

Gay.

Ta

Gay as a daisy. You're one step away from cramming man meat up your hoop. Kill yourself.

You sound like you have been compensating for being in the closet your whole life.

Accept it, embrace it, shout it from the roof tops you like chugging cock and your back "veeting" girlfriend is called derek

Even if there is the faintest chance you actually like fucking women your faux rockstar/teenage behaviour is woefully sad and laughably to all but the most retarded of women

I bet you do those metal devils horns hand signals and try to high-five young people

You come from the midlands and see yourself as a "Fun guy" don't you?

Kill yourself immediately

Not quite working out as planned is it ?







Oh,and you're a raging nancy boy!

I can totally relate, Mog. I'm partial to the odd meaty treat and the feeling of a prolapsed rectum... Oh, and I moisturise after showering.


Sent from my iPhone using ARRSE app with my weiner fingers.

Originally Posted by moggly

ped egg things-a small gauge cheesgrater

WTF? Apart from a disturbing picture emerging in my mind of manky cheddar infested feet, what the fuck do you apply to get rid of the "dead skin"? Google didn't return anything.

Originally Posted by moggly

Now I class meself as a real bloke - ride a 1600cc motorbike, do shedloads of x/c mountain biking, at 49 years young I am still moshing and slamming me head into huge speakers at my local rock/bikers pub as the live bands play very, VERY loud Sabbath/Maiden/Dio/Motorhead/AC/DC etc, done a few tours, drink beer not lager, wear proper Wrangler straight leg jeans with piss/beer stained trainers and black T-shirts. ( never in a million years would I wear fcuking shoes with jeans ), hate tucking in C95/wearing of belts over smocks, do not say partner or say other leftie phrases blah blah

However, every now and again I like to scrub me feet with one of those ped egg things-a small gauge cheesgrater ( you'd be surprised at how much dead skin comes off ) and then put some of me birds body butter on them-it makes me want to prance around the lounge on me tippytoes waving my arms about in a Peter out of Family Guy type way.

Anyone else have similar things we shouldn't really share.

I for one refuse to buy me mate his beer as he drinks lager tops

I accept I might get some shite for this but hey ho ( me bird also immacs/veets me back every few months-daren't get waxed )

You are queer as a nine bob note.

Suggest you start pm`ing Jarrod for advice and help on how to be a good queer.

Is your birds name Cecil?