Discuss Some of lifes unanswered questions in The NAAFI Bar on The Army Rumour Service; Now.
Well chaps I think we should be putting the really important unanswered questions to bed. I believe the power of arrse can do this, as a collective mental capacity it is like brainstorming session ...
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About LinkBacks- 27-06-2012, 20:03 #1Senior Member
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Some of lifes unanswered questions
Now.
Well chaps I think we should be putting the really important unanswered questions to bed. I believe the power of arrse can do this, as a collective mental capacity it is like brainstorming session to get those big questions. So if you have any questions maybe we can answer them.
My questions are:
Why the fuck when I go out on the tap with my mates, I get the fat ugly bird and the other is a stunner? I know I am not rats - as I can say i have bummed a couple of lookers also in time.
Why does toast land butter side up on my new pile carpet.
Whose that dirty cunt in the block/work who fails to flush the shit down the proper in the bog.
Why is it when i am on the R and R flight - I am the poor cunt who gets the shittest seat and latest plane back to UK.
If you have anymore question I am sure the powers of ARRSE can answer them.....I would rather be mexican bumwanked by giant haystacks and ram a jam jar of angry wasps up my ronson than be Camberwell Carrott.........
- 27-06-2012, 20:47 #2Senior Member
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Even though you never clean out the van....... even though you pick your nose, roll up the bogies and flick them on the floor....
You never ever end up ankle deep in bogies........
Do the spiders that live in your wing- mirrors sneak in at night to feast on them?
- 27-06-2012, 20:53 #3Senior Member
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Now thats strange, mine always seems to land butter side down.
Originally Posted by bitterandtwisted 
Sparky2339 and Sinner251 like this.Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants to see us happy." --Benjamin Franklin.
Arrse Coin number 825
- 27-06-2012, 21:03 #4Senior Member
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Why are people still eating butter when it has been proved beyond all doubt that it will cause a build up of cholesterol which might, err possibly, kill you?. Why do advertising companies that work for margerine manufacturers talk bollocks? Originally Posted by brummieboy1
- 27-06-2012, 21:05 #5Senior Member
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Why is there only one Monopolies Commission?
SauceDoctor and MPKaiser like this.Arte et Marte (twist to open)
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- 27-06-2012, 21:13 #6Senior Member
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Why hasn`t the Monopolies Commission been privatised so that all the tax dodging bent bankers can regulate each other? Originally Posted by Taff49
- 27-06-2012, 21:20 #7Senior Member
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How could my Slovak ex wife turn into such a money grabbing bitch?
Sparky2339 and cantbearsed2 like this.
- 27-06-2012, 21:24 #8Senior Member
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Why is it that my 8year old nephew with no military experience can kick the shit out of me at Battlefield 3. When I have 15 years worth?
CanteenCowboy likes this.
- 27-06-2012, 21:25 #9Senior Member
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If a tree falls in a forest and there's no-one there, do the other trees point at it and laugh?
The pen is mightier than the sword - until you meet someone who has knowledge of simple chemistry, metal forging and ballistics.
Be warned: I bear malice.
- 27-06-2012, 21:26 #10
Why won't my ex wife die?
Why when I visit the dale is she always in her fucking pit and I have to knock on the door like a rozzer to get her up.
Why do the blokes at work think all the skives they do are original.
Why do people ring me at work and ask questions when they know, with the amount of time I have left, I couldn't give a fuck.
Why do all the traffic lights on my way to work change to red as I approach them.Just cos you cant hear the voices does'nt mean they are'nt there!
I think I may be anorexic, everytime I look in the mirror there's a big fat fecker looking back!
The Snail "Do you wanna see my beaver?" HS "Go on then!"
The Snail "Oooooo you've touched my beaver!"
"Why are you not in uniform for your arrival interview Cpl HS?"
"That'll be because i've dekitted boss!"
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