ARmy Rumour SErvice

Originally Posted by The_Snail

I've got a Fireman Sam one*, but he's not a superhero.


*Don't ask why.....

WHY?

Originally Posted by King_of_the_Burpas

Shame on you for knowing this. Do you have a batlight in your bedroom?

Nope still buy the odd book now and again, collected up until I was thirty. Ex-wife burnt my collection which was insured and I got her done for criminal damage. Middle sized daughter is into comics and is working her way through what few I have left, classics Like the Dark Knight returns, Watchmen and Early Authority.

Originally Posted by [B

CaptainPlume;4468108]Who’s this? It’s Scaleytechman! Fighting injustice while locked in his heated ERV & gazing into a PC screen at pictures of naked ladies and reading stories about musclebound heroes rescuing pneumatic busted maidens from dragons while the steam from his tea mists the pebble-thick lenses of his spectacles.[/B]

And there is Cavman. Having lost his parents in a bizarre tobogganing accident on the Cresta Run he was raised by a family of peacocks which explains his magnificent range of costumes. Dashingly handsome & effortlessly elegant he would probably make a bit of a bish out of his crimefighting exploits were it not for his trusty retainer and sidekick Troopsergeantman who sorts out the scrapes he gets into.

You see that, thats me that is.

Originally Posted by Sinner251

Nope still buy the odd book now and again, collected up until I was thirty. Ex-wife burnt my collection which was insured and I got her done for criminal damage. Middle sized daughter is into comics and is working her way through what few I have left, classics Like the Dark Knight returns, Watchmen and Early Authority.

Must have been a messy divorce; piles of Captain Americas going up in smoke and your X-Men collection melting all over the hearth rug.

Why do people read these things? Some people big them up as a kind of social commentary, wrapped up in a good story. But why do the main characters always have to dress themselves up as dildoes with speshul powers in order to get the commentary across?

I reckon your ex did you a favour, mate; protecting you from yourself.

There's a common thread to all these 'super heroes'. They all do different things; x-ray eyes or immense strength and they all wear silly costumes.

They also, to a man share a vulnerable quality, just like every flaming TV detective.

They sit there on the bog, tights round their ankles and cape trussed up, head in hands, remembering a terrible trauma or injustice and weep into their gussets, before tighting up to save the world.

I can't imagine anybody other than a complete vegetable wanting to read these comics.

None of these come close to...

Originally Posted by DeltaDog

None of these come close to...

He should know. He's wearing one. Condoman sounds like the sort of chap who would sell you an apartment in Orlando.

I must admit I found Watchmen a little over rated & IMHO certainly not the incredible work of modern fiction it's supposed to be, although it passed time adequately enough. The rest of the superhero stuff with the exception of Batman leaves me cold.

Really enjoyed V For Vendetta and The League Of Extraordinary Gentlement, though, the latter for some superb draughtsmanship & rather clever conceits. The Joe Sacco stuff from Yugoslavia also meant a lot, although that could have been the time & place I was reading it.

Anyway, the best ever cartoon series* is Asterix, closely followed by Tintin. I use the former as an aid to learning new languages & have a shelf full of the things.

*As in not in a comic. The old style Beano/Dandy/Warlord/Commando & their ilk still have a special place in my heart.

The dam was about to burst, the nuclear powerplant was in the hands of Evilman, there was only one man who could save the townsfolk; with dread in their hearts they braved the route to his hideaway.

'Help us, only you have the mystical keys which will unleash vengeance on Evilman, and stop the dam from bursting and destroying the orphanage!' They cried.

'Fuck off! I'm closed!' Snarled Storeman

And the people left, happy that even in these troubled times some things will never change.