ARmy Rumour SErvice

**Miner** · 31-05-2012, 09:35

Swansea.
What a pithole of depression that place is.

First off, it's in Wales. And even as a Welshman that gives it default status on the shit towns/cities list.

Secondly, it's very hilly. With all the shit estates built on those hills. Which means no matter where you are in Swansea, you can see the shit estates stabbing the skyline. Manhatten it ain't.

Thirdly, nearly every inhabitant has got a massive chip on their shoulder about Cardiff. Whether it's because they get more coverage in the news, more coverage of their lower division football team, or the fact that most people in Cardiff have learnt to walk upright. They even moan that they didn't get the Welsh Assembly. FFS, why would you want it anyway, and did they really think it wouldn't be built in the capitol city, Cardiff? Fucking morons.

Fourthly, to get to it you have drive along the two lane section of the M4 at Port Talbot. An ominous sign of the shittyness to come.

Fifthly, if you want to see what fashion was like 10 years ago, go to Swansea. They recently made this film there. The sole reason being was that they didn't have to fork out money for authentic 70's clothes. Because every cunt still dresses that way.

Sixthly, and this seems to be endemic of all shit, no hope towns, there is a high propensity of steroid using, body building,muscle bound fuckcunts. You know the type, short/shaven hair (to hide the baldness), shit tattoos, baggy gym trousers (think MC Hammer), and tight, soooooooo tight vests/t-shirts. With higher pitched than normal voices, bordering on the effeminate. Think of them as muscle bound Cinderella's, all roided up and nowhere to go.

Seventhly, the Mumbles. Now some here may remember fondly doing the "Mumbles Mile". A pub crawl a mile long along the Mumbles sea front. Forget it, it's gone. There are about 3, maybe 4 drinking establishments left in that mile now. And I say drinking establishments as they are not all pubs anymore. They are mostly over priced cafes with an alcohol license, selling paninis and lattes to twats. They are catering to the "lifestyle" choice people and retirees who all live in the area now. One road in and out, it's an absolute nightmare for traffic on a sunny day as every wanker in a 5mile radius, feels the calling of the Mumbles. It's a shitty twatting bay with a view of Port Talbot steel works, and over priced shops, you fucking imbeciles.

All in all, Swansea is a fucking blight on the outskirts of the Gower peninsula.

I can't wait to fucking leave the cess pool. The house went on the market this week, and we've got viewings lined up. Fucking brill!

**Biscuits_AB** · 31-05-2012, 09:39

Originally Posted by Taff49

Why on earth does any town need 3 Greggs?

In Rotherham's case they thought it might make an improvement.

**the_armadillo** · 31-05-2012, 10:33

I agree with Canvey - just waiting to slink back into the sea from whence it came, like a rancid, crumbling, bleak and depressing version of Atlantis. Basildon (named Basildump) would also be on my list - seems all the houses are council houses, with a horrible, crappy excuse for a high street and a properly pikey 'market'.
I'd also agree with Chatham, and Maidstone could only be improved if they used it as target practise for the RAF first. Kent is the garden of England? Don't make me laugh....

**tuffy52** · 31-05-2012, 10:38

Originally Posted by Glad_its_all_over

Gloucester. All the chavvery from above, plus a pall of gloom hanging over the shabby streets - it's as if the Boy Potter's Dementors had taken up permanent residence. Add in the shambling Beaker People from the Forest and stunted Neanderthals from Quedgely, pointing open-mouthed at cars and glazed windows and the carpet of drunken, tracksuit-bottom-wearing illiterate cretinous babyfathers ignoring the bloated, red-faced harridans who incubate their vile spawn and you have a splendid day out if you live in the decent part of Gloucestershire. It's like visiting Bedlam to mock the inmates, except it's free.

You have to give Fred and Rose a bit of credit getting rid of all those baby machines.....

**tank8367** · 31-05-2012, 10:46

Harrogate...people think its posh-well it fucking well ain't....there are a few council estates here that rival any shithole estate in Liverpool (sadly,my home town) Banjo playin'cheap lager swillin' inbreds.....

**Flaggie** · 31-05-2012, 10:55

Originally Posted by swissian

Newark or Dudley , equally awful. Shaven headed, hard-faced, beaten down by life, self-tattooed primark-wearing miserable fcukers

Ledbury is nice

Concur with Ledbury. Couple of good pubs, and a café doing amazing(ly calorific) cakes next to the old market building.

**kilo42** · 31-05-2012, 10:57

You poor bastards.

With best wishes from the Scottish highlands.

There'll Always Be an England - YouTube

**samain11** · 31-05-2012, 11:08

Your even safe in villages anymore, any new development of "affordable" homes brings another injection of these useless cunts from the towns, along with their feral brats and go-faster Corsa's. We have always had our own indiginous population of drugged up, shouty, lowlives scattered around the Yelverton area, but there was no need to artificially increase the size of the herd.
A brand new development of 9 terraced houses got a pikey make-over in less than a year, abandoned cars, dogshit and empty white lightening bottles...cunts, this is rural West Devon currently being used as an overflow for a rising population of Wayne and Waynetta Slobb's in that toilet-by-the-sea going by the name of Plymouth. What really grips my shit is that these benefit scrounging wasters can afford to get taxi's to go and see their dealers while their minging "partners" infest the co-op spending their brat's milk money on scratch cards and booze and not a single fucking job amongst the lot 'em. Can't blame ethnics either, 99% home-fucking-grown.

**WolvoExPunk** · 31-05-2012, 11:08

Somebody mentioned Hull. When I was on my HGV course at Leconsfield in 1989, I went down Hull with a mate who was on an earlier course and knew the place. On a wanked off Monday night, we saw more action than what most towns get on a Saturday night. Come the weekend, it was into Hull, and it was totty central. Places I remember were The Shire, Hull Cheese, Lexington Avenue, and my favourite Oasis.

Even while driving thru the city in my Bedford in the day time, it was all the discipline I could muster to keep my eyes on the road, and not on the gorgeous mini-skirt, tiny shorts, crop top wearing young ladies which seemed to be everywhere.

I went there again years later on a 6x6 driving course, and had another great night in LA's.

A few months after leaving the Army, I stopped there overnight while driving a lorry, and the main area for a night out was by the canalside.

Fast forward another few years as a civvy I was working in Hull, and staying in the city centre. I went out on a Thursady, and the place was just desolate. I could have lay dead and not been found until the following morning. I have no further intentions to visit Hull or to recommend it to anybody for a good night out.