ARmy Rumour SErvice

**Glad_its_all_over** · 27-05-2012, 20:22

Sitting in a hotel room far from home and talking to my colleague on the work Skype, this immortal line surfaced, with the addition "come to that, you're not gay if you're taking, as long as you don't push back or make eye contact".

Now, my pal is something of an expert, being a romping stomping ex-paratrooper airborne death from above suicide death commando and I was a REMF of the ocean-going class, so I turn the question over to the mighty intellects of the NAAFI Bar:

Are you, in fact, not gay if:

a. You're giving
b. You don't push back
c. You don't make eye contact

**toryboy** · 27-05-2012, 20:33

Hmmm, it depends on the circumstances really. I have heard that its not gay as long as your balls don't touch, but I've yet to see that hypothesis tested.

**theoriginalphantom** · 27-05-2012, 20:36

If you have to ask the question then surely you are gayer than a gay thing wearing nothing more than gilttery rainbow body paint while being porked by Jarrod in the middle of a gay pride march.

just a guess mind

**King_of_the_Burpas** · 27-05-2012, 20:38

Is it just me or is Arrse becoming a bit poofy? All these pink threads popping up like San Franciscan attention whores. There's a lot of outing going on, imho.

**Barry Buddon** · 27-05-2012, 20:40

You have to punch them afterwards
You have to cry afterwards
You can't kiss them
At least one party has to be in pain .

Fuck! I think I have just described the sex life with my ex missus.

**Provost** · 27-05-2012, 20:42

Originally Posted by Glad_its_all_over

Sitting in a hotel room far from home and talking to my colleague on the work Skype, this immortal line surfaced, with the addition "come to that, you're not gay if you're taking, as long as you don't push back or make eye contact".

Now, my pal is something of an expert, being a romping stomping ex-paratrooper airborne death from above suicide death commando and I was a REMF of the ocean-going class, so I turn the question over to the mighty intellects of the NAAFI Bar:

Are you, in fact, not gay if:

a. You're giving
b. You don't push back
c. You don't make eye contact

.... unless you're a cook, bandsman or medic.

**Barry Buddon** · 27-05-2012, 20:44

Originally Posted by King_of_the_Burpas

Is it just me or is Arrse becoming a bit poofy? All these pink threads popping up like San Franciscan attention whores. There's a lot of outing going on, imho.

I think if you know any gayers then they always seem jolly, have disposable incomes and are out on the lash all the time doing mind bending drugs. We poor hetero's are mainly miserable , skint and get fucking nagged on a sunday to do jobs round the house.

Its a lovely evening too i might take the excuse for a walk and do a bit of cottaging , cheers

**toffeewrapper1** · 27-05-2012, 20:45

Originally Posted by Barry Buddon

You have to punch them afterwards
You have to cry afterwards
You can't kiss them
At least one party has to be in pain .

Fuck! I think I have just described the sex life with my ex missus.

And did it really hurt and did you cry when she punched you,you rampant nancy boy?

**Bravo2nothing** · 27-05-2012, 20:45

You don't use lube.

**theoriginalphantom** · 27-05-2012, 20:46

Originally Posted by King_of_the_Burpas

Is it just me or is Arrse becoming a bit poofy? All these pink threads popping up like San Franciscan attention whores. There's a lot of outing going on, imho.

it's becoming gay enough to shit rainbows
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