My favourite technique was to "rescue" birds from pissheads/chubbers/mongs by walking over and pretending to be an old friend, didn't always get me a shag but it never got me a slap.

Call me an old romantic, but...

Ah, that's better.

Originally Posted by filthyphil

Ah, that's better.

Ta Da!

I like his style, stayed away from her tits, punched her grid in, then left her 'open' for plod to have a poke about, you have to admit, its an approach that will get you a 'win,win' situation everytime.

I remember a line from PJ O'Rourke 'There are many devices on the market that stimulate sexual activity in women. Chief among these is a Mercedes 350SL on a sunny day with the top down'.

An agriculural 25 year oldish civvie I know from a pub I used to drink in broke his neck when he hit a badger while roaring home pissed on his motorbike one night.

He was eventually released from hospital with one of those 'crown of thorns' things bolted in around his skull further secured by metal rods going down into his collar bones to he couldn't bend his neck or rotate his head.

To celebrate getting out he got his mate to take him off down to the night clubs in Bournemouth where he told various women he was a recovering fast jet pilot who had to eject but banged his head on the canopy on the way out.

After his second blowjob in the bogs his head began to hurt and he called it a night.

Originally Posted by Hector_Chavez_V

I like his style, stayed away from her tits, punched her grid in, then left her 'open' for plod to have a poke about, you have to admit, its an approach that will get you a 'win,win' situation everytime.

I have to admit ur one sick fcuk , but i like it

Originally Posted by unicycle

Money, lots of money. It is the only sure fire way to get into a womans knickers. The reason is that all woman are evil, shallow, empty shells that value shiney things and bog houses over everything else.

And God tells you to kill them.

A pair of skin- tight white flares (1960's) with no undercrackers and an unfeasibly large bulge always worked for me, plus when she reported back to her mates that I was quite fond of swallowing furry oysters...... full house.

Originally Posted by vinniethemanxcat

A pair of skin- tight white flares (1960's) with no undercrackers and an unfeasibly large bulge always worked for me, plus when she reported back to her mates that I was quite fond of swallowing furry oysters...... full house.

Blue Farahs and being the RAF worked fine for me. Oh, and the big wallet