ARmy Rumour SErvice

**jimmys_best_mate** · 07-02-2012, 22:16

Originally Posted by Showmi_York-Hunt

I'd love to be a fly on the wall when he has to answer for his 'fuck the Pope and the virgin Mary' attitude to the son of the lady in question and the fella that knocked her up!

You reckon Mary and some random Roman Centurion that she fucked behind the bins outside the Bethlehem bop will be waiting for him when he dies?

**rgjbloke** · 07-02-2012, 22:19

Originally Posted by fairy_nuff

Did anyone have him in the Dead Pool 2012? No I didn't either

That is a surprise. He's been a leading candidate for the list every year since 1969ish. I would have thought he'd have been a favourite right behind Bobby Sands.

**Showmi_York-Hunt** · 07-02-2012, 22:49

Originally Posted by jimmys_best_mate

You reckon Mary and some random Roman Centurion that she fucked behind the bins outside the Bethlehem bop will be waiting for him when he dies?

Are you trying to say Mary was a slapper with a craving for military cock who made up this 'impregnated by the holy spirit' crap that's led the world on a merry dance for 2000+ years?

**saladin** · 07-02-2012, 23:05

Originally Posted by SauceDoctor

He speaks very highly of you.

Never....

**HHH** · 08-02-2012, 00:44

Originally Posted by fairy_nuff

Did anyone have him in the Dead Pool 2012? No I didn't either

Yes I have him!

Sent from my iPhone using my ARRSE

**SauceDoctor** · 08-02-2012, 00:48

It's not a heart condition he has, it's an ulcer. They told him they were going to remove it, but Big Ian told them "My ulcer says NO!"

**Alec_Lomas** · 08-02-2012, 12:19

Originally Posted by DavidBOC

I never thought I would see they day that Martin McGuinness would be calling for prayers for Lord Bannside (nee Big Ian)

<does anyone know of hell has frozen over>

Macker and the Big One spend time together in prayer. It's being going on for a few years. Ian's been noticed entering the portals of Clonard Monastery. Like you I checked the moon on receipt of that info.

Edited to add - While that murdering bastard Macker has reasons to beg forgiveness, I surmise in Big Ian's circumstances, he was ensuring that he and his fuckwitted son's (both MP's at the time) parlimentary expenses would pass unremarked.

**skid2** · 08-02-2012, 14:39

Very good. Ian Paisley in Clonard....there'd be the sound of rattling and spinning coming from the wooden box.

**Dennis48** · 08-02-2012, 14:42

Apparently they were going to take him to the Royal but he demanded Ulster.

**Herrumph** · 08-02-2012, 16:13

I bet the miserable old bigot has demanded that his coffin is paraded around some traditional old (catholic inhabited) routes.

Aren't funeral corteges exempt Parade Commission rulings?