For those who remember Kira fucking Cochrane from 2006, and the plethora of threads she inspired (bless her)...

some of the comments on the AMMM courtcase thread Cancel the boiled eggs .... reminded me of the hilarious limerick competition hosted by BaldricksBullet back in the day. Another note to journos - 7-62 Competition

So here's my lame starter for 10:

The once was a blogger called Clare,
Who sought the publicity glare.
But it caused quite a ripple,
When her bloke saw a nipple,
He wanked in another bird's hair!

Good thread! You missed an option off the poll, but for fear of being "moderated" I'm not going to say what it is.

There once was a woman named Clare
Her husband went up the stair
He whipped out his chopper
And he played with her plopper
And then got punched to the flaer

His dress sense is fucking gopping
as he let's his wife do his clothes shopping,
a nice anorak
and a suit off the rack
and some tap shoes to go clip, clip, clop in!

Claire MacNaughton the gurning twat
patronising arsehole all round prat
a modern EX military mother so proud
Of her husband Hagar aloft in the cloud
the arguments started, rows and bickers
All ended with a hand int wrong knickers.

A bloke thought his wife was a dog,
So he grabbed a mate's wife for a snog.
He fingered her pie,
While in bed she did lie,
How come THAT never appeared in the blog?!?

Originally Posted by Bollock-chops

Claire MacNaughton the gurning twat
patronising arsehole all round prat
a modern EX military mother so proud
Of her husband Hagar aloft in the cloud
the arguments started, rows and bickers
All ended with a hand int wrong knickers.

you were away the day they taught "limericks" in school, then?

There once was a woman called "Totty"
Her hubby caused her mate to get all snotty
He played with her bits
Jizzed on her tits
She should have just given him her botty.

There was a crab pilot called Kai,
Who hoped for a nosh on the sly.
He felt up her twat,
Got no further than that.
And then told the judge that he really just popped in for a sneaky wank over his mate's wife's tits whilst she was asleep.


(Sorry, I know the last line still needs some work )

A modern military mother
had a husband with an eye for another
While his mate read a blog
he escaped the old dog
and their guest in crab-fat he did smother