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  1. #1
    Senior Member Doogonk's Avatar
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    Jan 2009
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    Self skiffing!!!!!

    Troops!

    While researching various sources in a quest to locate the ultimate skiff I came across the following past post. I make no apologies for bringing this to your attention as:

    a) It was initially posted in 2005 so will be fresh and new to alot of you.
    b) I find the act of self skiffing fekkin' hysterical.

    I take no credit for this witty postage but have been giggling randomly since reading it the other day. What the hell.... if nuffin else it brightens up a dull Thursday afternoon eh! And surely there must have been more "self skiffage" over the past 5 years! Enjoy.

    http://www.arrse.co.uk/Forums/viewtopic/t=13241.html
    If all else fails.... kill sumfin!

  2. #2
    Senior Member bigbird67's Avatar
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    Nov 2006
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    7,203

    Re: Self skiffing!!!!!

    Surely everyone sniffs their finger after scratching their bum don't they? It's an animal instinct thing!
    "Close your eyes and pucker up. No, I'm not gonna kiss you. I just wanted you to look like a blind arsehole."

    STM

  3. #3
    Senior Member maguire's Avatar
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    Mar 2005
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    Re: Self skiffing!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by bigbird67
    Surely everyone sniffs their finger after scratching their bum don't they? It's an animal instinct thing!
    and if you dont check the paper after you've wipd how can you be sure you got everything??
    is madly in love with the Slug and doesnt care who knows it. from the moment she first got me in a headlock and took my lunch money off me, I knew she was the only girl for me.

    'Have you had enough? Have you had enough you fucking Moldavian bastard, your Excellency.'

    xbox 360 gamertag - ShootThemLater6

  4. #4
    Senior Member dropshortjock's Avatar
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    Jun 2008
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    888

    Re: Self skiffing!!!!!

    There was a LCpl in one place I worked who with generosity of spirit made a brew, complete with caffeine-free skiff, for his Pl Comd. Luckily (and most amusingly for the rest of the Pl stood nearby), said Pl Comd had not been born yesterday and instead made the LCpl drink it himself. It must have been a seriously dedicated cup of skea/skoffee as there was much gagging and forcing the puking action to quieten down...
    "This car would be less annoying to the environmentalists if the engine ran on sliced dolphin."

  5. #5
    Senior Member Doogonk's Avatar
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    Jan 2009
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    726

    Re: Self skiffing!!!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by maguire
    Quote Originally Posted by bigbird67
    Surely everyone sniffs their finger after scratching their bum don't they? It's an animal instinct thing!
    and if you dont check the paper after you've wipd how can you be sure you got everything??
    Well aye.... but there is a subtle difference between scanning the paper for residue and using it to blat sh1te all over your top lip eh!
    If all else fails.... kill sumfin!

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